Life can sure have distasteful adventures at times. The last four months have been one fast roller coaster ride I wanted to get off of. In October of 2015, I ended up going to urgent care because part of my leg went paralyzed. Turns out it was from major anxiety due to some stressful family situation that I was not handling properly in my life. I had no idea that my body could actually become paralyzed due to stress. I knew that anxiety is also a symptom of fibromyalgia, but I never wanted to admit it...I have to use techniques to lower the anxiety.
Also, I ended up gaining weight and having all sorts of new health issues and symptoms, due to the lovely gifts that I was presented with, due to my age. And that wonderful doctor said I have abnormal perimenopause. Wow. When I deal with new health issues, it seems to always be abnormal for some reason. Doctors have told me that it might be because I have Fibromyalgia. I should know better; why would this be any different? I ended up having to replace all of my clothes because nothing fit anymore. I have been fortunate all my life and never have had to deal with gaining weight until now. It's all because of, oh, what's it called again? Oh yes, perimenopause. Oh and I never knew what a true hot flash felt like until recently. Wow what a new adventure I'm having.....but I'll spare you the details on that subject. I know this article may be long, but please read it to the end.
For a year, I had to spoon feed my precious fur baby Buttons because he was acting like he couldn't see the food that was in his bowl. Yet when I put the food up to his mouth he would devour it like he was starving. I rearranged my schedule to always spoon feed him and make sure I had a cat sitter, if I wasn't home. I even had to put a bowl of water up to his face for him to drink more. I knew he was getting older and was a ripe old age of 96 years, which is 20 years in human years, so I had to keep an eye on him.
In November, I was scheduled with an exterminator to spray my apartment. Dealing with fibromyalgia and other health issues, I had to try to pace myself as it took me three days to pack everything up and put a sheet over it all. After they sprayed the kitchen, I had to spend another three days to unpack everything and put it all away. It took me a few days to recuperate. That weekend, the gas company came to check the gas pilot on my heater. They said it was producing carbon monoxide so they shut it off and red tagged my heater. Then the apartment office personnel had to get an outside company to install a new heater. I thought everything was great until I kept smelling gas from the new heater. I called the gas company again. The gas man said that whomever installed the heater, put in the wrong gas valve. They put in one for the "propane tank" instead of a regular gas valve. He red tagged my heater again after shutting it off. This time the supervisor of the company came to replace the gas valve to the proper one to make sure it was done right. I wanted to make sure it was accurate so the gas company tech came a third time and approved it.
Then I noticed Buttons wasn't eating or drinking enough. I thought maybe it had to do with the exterminator or the gas leak, although I did take him out of my apartment for both incidents. After a vet visit, I found out that he had chronic kidney disease, his kidneys and liver were shutting down, plus his bone marrow was suppressed, amongst other things. I ended up having to put him down because I didn't want him to suffer any more. That was very hard because I love him so much. He was my fur baby and pet companion. He was the one that was near me when I was in intense pain and comforted me often. He left a paw print on my heart. (After he died, I wanted to give myself a chance to grieve before getting another pet companion even though a couple of my friends wanted to give me a cat. I was grieving lots and couldn't think of having another pet at the moment).
On December 2, there was a terrorist attack that was in a nearby city. I was supposed to go to two doctor appts that day, but fear gripped me so much that I didn't want to leave my place. I couldn't go near the horrendous incident, although, I did make myself go for a walk the next day. Three days later, I was grieving from losing Buttons and had anxiety over the massive shooting, so I thought I should adopt a cat to help calm me down. I have always wanted to adopt a cat from the animal shelter. When I was there, this loving cat who I named Gracie kept purring when I held her. That's when Gracie, my new pet companion, entered my life. She helped ease the fear and anxiety I was having and gave me something to keep me busy.
I didn't realize it until later, but I was itching all over my body since I got Gracie. Turns out she was diagnosed with sarcoptic mange, intestinal parasites, respiratory infection, and more....plus ringworm later. So guess what? What I thought were flea bites on me, were actually scabies that I got from the cat. Gracie had to be isolated and we both had to be treated, including my whole apartment. I had to put everything in plastic bags for a week to ten days. After going to the doctor due to 2 spots that didn't heal from the scabies, I found out I also had ringworm due to the cat. What a mess!!
During that time, the bank contacted me due to a fraudulent charge so I had to get a new credit card and they put my account on hold for a week. Thankfully I already did my Christmas shopping. When I was getting over all of this, we ended up having a major gas leak in my apartment on the third floor. My adrenaline took over and I called the gas company and was instructed to have the third level residents evacuated. It was so thick and I have a sensitive system in my body that I had to get fresh air or I was going to pass out. I felt nauseated and lightheaded yet I got Gracie, my cat, to the first floor and then try to tell everyone on my floor to evacuate. It turned out to be one major gas leak in one of my friend's apartments. It's actually a miracle that she is alive.
I was trying to fight for Gracie's life that was full of health issues. I knew if we took her back to the animal shelter, she would be put down. I didn't want that to happen, yet I couldn't handle the 5 medications a day, at different times a day, and the cleaning up after her sickness, etc... plus all the care I had to encounter over my own chronic health issues. It was too much for me to bear; and I was so worn out. I felt bad but I had to give her to someone who could take care of her with all her health issues. And yes, I made sure my friend knew all the health issues and medications that Gracie was on before she took her into her home.
I ended up getting treatment for ringworm, had to bleach my bathroom where Gracie was isolated, had to disinfect my whole apartment again, steam cleaned the carpets with tea tree oil to kill all mites and ringworm, and wash all dirty and clean clothes, linens, pillows, throw rugs, jackets, etc.. in tea tree oil. Thankfully a couple of friends helped me at the laundry mat or it would have been even a longer ordeal.
I finally have put all my belongings away, reorganized my place, and am getting my life back to normal. I probably have the cleanest, most disinfectant apartment there is. I am no longer contagious...yay me. I have dealt with a lot but I keep telling myself it could have been worse. I have grown from these losses and crazy happenings in my life. It was not (and is not) easy going through all that I went through but I have had to keep leaning on God through the process. I also learned that when I was disinfecting my place and washing all the loads of laundry, that it is just "stuff" and do I really need it all? I ended up letting go of things. I had too much and sometimes it's time to just let things go. (Now I have that song in my head "Let it Go" from the animated movie Frozen).
I have done a lot of grieving lately. Not only did I have to say goodbye to Buttons, but I have known 12 people and a friend's animal have died in the past two years. I could only get myself to go to a few of the funerals/memorials because it was too much for me. The hardest was having to let my fur baby Buttons go. I still cry because he was very special to me. I have to picture, in my mind, those 12 people and two animals in Heaven. It's what gets me through it, besides God's strength....I am still looking forward to that big reunion in Heaven where I will see them all, face to face again. Boy, I can't wait to go to Heaven; it is going to be one big family reunion, for me. And for the near future, I'm looking forward to getting a pet companion..
