CRAZY TIMES POEM

I've been sitting here watching the coronavirus news,

And have to do something so I don't feel so blue.

I start a LIVE video where I am the silly host.

then I read all of my friend's very talented posts.

I watch funny cat and dog videos, and all the coronavirus stats.

And see all my friends' pictures of plates of food, and say "hey, I can make that."

Then I realize my cupboards are free from all the ingredients and more...

So we jump in our cool car and run to the store.

I look for all the spices, veggies and the steak,

And look for some big potatoes that I can bake.

I'm running low on toilet paper, so why don't I get some NOW?

So I wheel the squeaky cart over to that aisle, and say "OH WOW."

All of the paper products are gone from the shelves, except one, you see.

One lonely roll of paper towels is staring right at me

I think that would be so rough on my bum, oh my.

Why is there no toilet paper? oh why? Oh why?

I watch as a sea of people wheel on by.  

Their carts are full with meat, extra canned goods and tons of that 2 ply.

I run over to them and beg for a roll or two.

They insist they need it all and I start to feel blue.

What am I going to wipe my bum with? Oh me, oh my.

Suddenly I see a friend who sees me feel sad and cry

He gives me a package of his limited 2 ply.
I am so grateful for his generosity and my tears are all dry.

My life is back to normal because I got some toilet paper, hip hop horray!!!

The world is gone crazy, but I'm a happy camper today.


By Tanya Carroll
a.k.a. Tanya Kirkendall

An Amazing Present

Merry Christmas everyone. Actually I just spent  the day with my dear friend Peggy who I've known for 15 years. Her son Darrel, was the guy who was like a brother to me, who passed away last month. Since he died a few weeks before Christmas last year, Peggy and I exchanged presents today. It was more special to learn that before Darrel passed, that he helped pick out a blanket for me. On it was a big picture of a kitten who was the same color of my cat Gracie who recently died. They never got to see Gracie because he was sick the last 2 years so they had no idea what color she was. It's amazing that he picked out a blanket that would comfort my heart in the future because of losing him and Gracie.  He had no idea but I bet God had his hand in this.

It is interesting how things happen in life. I am doing better than I was from all the losses. Yet I know I have gained 4 more loved ones in Heaven, one of whom is very furry...oh and my dear Buttons greeted them all..he was another furry one in Heaven...he got to show my Gracie and more loved ones, the golden streets and the amazing vivid green grass. One day we will all be united. Until then, I'm living my life and enjoying being with loved ones still on earth.

January 2019

One Memorable Day

You would have laughed at my adventure. Last Saturday we were in the middle of a heatwave and it was already 102 degrees, at noon, where I live. My boyfriend and I took a trip up to the mountains where it would be cooler at 86 degrees. When I arrived, I immediately felt relaxed, and enjoyed breathing in the fresh air. The weather was so wonderful compared to the 114 degrees we felt a day earlier. We took out our cameras and took shots of the beautiful trees and relaxing lake. We were having a wonderful, peaceful time together.

We continued to take pictures of the lake as it started to drizzle and yet we were laughing at all the people who had left in a hurry because of the little drizzle. To us, it was so refreshing to be away from the heat and it felt so easier to breathe with the cool moisture in the air.

We walked back to our picnic area because I needed a drink of water from my water bottle which I left on the picnic table. Since we walked back we decided to eat lunch. We chatted and enjoyed each other's company in the breathtaking scenery yet our yummy picnic food was starting to get wet because it started to rain.Thankfully we were near a tree where we could wait under until the rain stopped.  We still chatted and enjoyed the fresh air and laughed at the situation and how only a few people were in sight. 

Then all of a sudden, my boyfriend looked toward the lake, and noticed that their was a storm. It was down pouring on the lake and would soon be coming toward us. I grabbed my camera and made sure it was protected yet quickly and gently placed in the camera bag. I kept it with me so it wouldn't get ruined. (This is the day I learned that my camera bag is water proof. Thank God for that!!!) 

Suddenly all of our items: various food, travel bag, etc... was soaked. I was going to put it all under the table but I noticed there were ants underneath and I didn't want to deal with that mess.  We had nowhere to go but be sheltered from the storm under the tree we were under. Thank God for the trees. I seriously thought of hunkering down and taking shelter underneath the picnic table but I did enjoy the atmosphere and the adventure I was having with my love. I just laughed at my bag of chips which I probably should have grabbed and put under the tree with me...It was soaked. Later I looked in my travel bag and the half roll of toilet paper I brought, in case there were not any in the bathrooms, was soaked, as well...So glad I didn't need it. lol 

I am grateful that I did have to get my water bottle before the storm hit. If I didn't need a drink of water, we would have been soaked on the path by the lake; and I would not have been able to protect my nice camera. There is quite a difference from being wet by the rain than being soaked by the storm. We stayed under that beautiful tree for about 20 minutes as the temperature dropped 20 degrees in about an hour to around 69 degrees. It was a bit cold since we were wet.  

When the rain let up we decided we better hurry to the car.  As we got to the parking lot, there were some little rivers due to the downpour and I noticed one poor guy who had just finished putting his boat in his truck. He was completely soaked. 

Like I said, we were not too wet, but just enough to make me shiver a little from the cooler rain. Well I was wearing shorts and not wearing a coat or sweater when I left my apartment because it was 102 degrees.When I sat in the car, I grabbed a blanket to wrap around me to keep me warm. It was a blanket that I had in a pillow case which was soaked yet somehow the blanket was only a little wet.. 

We were laughing at our hilarious adventure as we returned to our city which was now at 109 degrees. It was such a drastic difference from the coolness up in the mountains. I didn't bother to worry about the back seat in the car that was wet from the storm because anything can dry fast, in a 109 degrees.  

I am still laughing about the adventure we had. It was so much fun...It's an adventure I will always remember.  
This adventure does remind me, though, that God shelters us from the storm just like the tree did for my boyfriend and I.

Adventures of Venice Beach in CA

There are a lot of interesting characters that made me laugh a lot, or was it the great weather, hanging with my friend, or enjoying this variety of culture and adventure. This day was fun and yet interesting at the same time....

After about ten minutes of our arrival to the boardwalk which was filled of various shops and vendors, there was a guy trying to lure me into his shop for some "marijuana" that he sold. I declined yet marijuana filled different parts of the boardwalk. I hope there are no affects from 2nd hand smoke of marijuana lol...otherwise I'm in trouble. 

It was so cool watching a guy sing and play his guitar while he was riding his bike.  There was another guy in some creative skates rolling down the boardwalk also playing his own guitar. That was another intriguing moments. Then there were probably 10 temporary tattoo vendors, many unusual and funny shirt shops, and some crude that I didn't like. I enjoyed watching some musical artists including an average looking lady playing a piano that she somehow dragged in for the day.

I saw a guy riding his bike with a platform for his dogs who were sitting right above the front tire. Those dog were so relaxed There were blue haired people, dread locks on white boy's heads, and dogs galore, not to mention the long albino snake on a guy's shoulders that we stayed away from.

There were unusual artistic talents to beautiful artwork pieces. One artist had a painting of a head with all sorts of scenes in that painting. It was amazing.  There were a few musical artists that were passing out free cds of their raegae music and then the next thing you know is you are donating money for a free c.d.

Then there was a freak show about to start where people were paying to go inside to take pictures of the so- called freaks. I realized I couldn't go inside that place when I saw the employees who they considered freaks that were on the steps for advertisement. One lady didn't have any legs, another guy was a little person or what people consider midgets. Another person had basically grown a full beard all over his whole head. I couldn't go in because I knew I would cry due to my grown compassionate nature. I don't think those are freaks; they are people like you and me who have things that aren't the average person. I was thinking about how much God so loved them,

And yes everyone on the boardwalk was a person trying to live their lives in different ways. Some not as successful as others. There were homeless people trying to get a buck from ones passing by, some others may have been homeless but they were trying to sell a piece of themselves in their unusual artwork.

I took some pictures but my not-so smartphone deleted them all. I so wish I had the pictures I took of the huge beautiful waves crashing into the magnificent rocks. It was so breathtaking; God's masterpiece.

It was a great day, and yet I wonder if it somehow changed me....I feel more cultured.

I have Survived Much.

Life can sure have distasteful adventures at times. The last four months have been one fast roller coaster ride I wanted to get off of.  In October of 2015, I ended up going to urgent care because part of my leg went paralyzed. Turns out it was from major anxiety due to some stressful family situation that I was not handling properly in my life. I had no idea that my body could actually become paralyzed due to stress. I knew that anxiety is also a symptom of fibromyalgia, but I never wanted to admit it...I have to use techniques to lower the anxiety.

 

Also, I ended up gaining weight and having all sorts of new health issues and symptoms, due to the lovely gifts that I was presented with, due to my age.  And that wonderful doctor said I have abnormal perimenopause. Wow. When I deal with new health issues, it seems to always be abnormal for some reason. Doctors have told me that it might be because I have Fibromyalgia.  I should know better; why would this be any different? I ended up having to replace all of my clothes because nothing fit anymore.  I have been fortunate all my life and never have had to deal with gaining weight until now.  It's all because of, oh, what's it called again? Oh yes, perimenopause. Oh and I never knew what a true hot flash felt like until recently. Wow what a new adventure I'm having.....but I'll spare you the details on that subject. I know this article may be long, but please read it to the end.

 

For a year, I had to spoon feed my precious fur baby Buttons because he was acting like he couldn't see the food that was in his bowl. Yet when I put the food up to his mouth he would devour it like he was starving. I rearranged my schedule to always spoon feed him and make sure I had a cat sitter, if I wasn't home.  I even had to put a bowl of water up to his face for him to drink more. I knew he was getting older and was a ripe old age of 96 years, which is 20 years in human years, so I had to keep an eye on him.

 

In November, I was scheduled with an exterminator to spray my apartment. Dealing with fibromyalgia and other health issues, I had to try to pace myself as it took me three days to pack everything up and put a sheet over it all.  After they sprayed the kitchen, I had to spend another three days to unpack everything and put it all away. It took me a few days to recuperate. That weekend, the gas company came to check the gas pilot on my heater. They said it was producing carbon monoxide so they shut it off and red tagged my heater. Then the apartment office personnel had to get an outside company to install a new heater. I thought everything was great until I kept smelling gas from the new heater. I called the gas company again. The gas man said that whomever installed the heater, put in the wrong gas valve. They put in one for the "propane tank" instead of a regular gas valve. He red tagged my heater again after shutting it off. This time the supervisor of the company came to replace the gas valve to the proper one to make sure it was done right. I wanted to make sure it was accurate so the gas company tech came a third time and approved it.

 

Then I noticed Buttons wasn't eating or drinking enough. I thought maybe it had to do with the exterminator or the gas leak, although I did take him out of my apartment for both incidents.  After a vet visit, I found out that he had chronic kidney disease, his kidneys and liver were shutting down, plus his bone marrow was suppressed, amongst other things. I ended up having to put him down because I didn't want him to suffer any more. That was very hard because I love him so much.  He was my fur baby and pet companion. He was the one that was near me when I was in intense pain and comforted me often. He left a paw print on my heart. (After he died, I wanted to give myself a chance to grieve before getting another pet companion even though a couple of my friends wanted to give me a cat. I was grieving lots and couldn't think of having another pet at the moment).

 

On December 2, there was a terrorist attack that was in a nearby city. I was supposed to go to two doctor appts that day, but fear gripped me so much that I didn't want to leave my place. I couldn't go near the horrendous incident, although, I did make myself go for a walk the next day. Three days later,  I was grieving from losing Buttons and had anxiety over the massive shooting, so I thought I should adopt a cat to help calm me down. I have always wanted to adopt a cat from the animal shelter. When I was there, this loving cat who I named Gracie kept purring when I held her. That's when Gracie, my new pet companion, entered my life. She helped ease the fear and anxiety I was having and gave me something to keep me busy.

 

I didn't realize it until later, but I was itching all over my body since I got Gracie. Turns out she was diagnosed with sarcoptic mange, intestinal parasites, respiratory infection, and more....plus ringworm later. So guess what?  What I thought were flea bites on me, were actually scabies that I got from the cat. Gracie had to be isolated and we both had to be treated, including my whole apartment. I had to put everything in plastic bags for a week to ten days. After going to the doctor due to 2 spots that didn't heal from the scabies, I found out I also had ringworm due to the cat.  What a mess!!

 

During that time, the bank contacted me due to a fraudulent charge so I had to get a new credit card and they put my account on hold for a week. Thankfully I already did my Christmas shopping. When I was getting over all of this, we ended up having a major gas leak in my apartment on the third floor. My adrenaline took over and I called the gas company and was instructed to have the third level residents evacuated. It was so thick and I have a sensitive system in my body that I had to get fresh air or I was going to pass out. I felt nauseated and lightheaded yet I got Gracie, my cat, to the first floor and then try to tell everyone on my floor to evacuate. It turned out to be one major gas leak in one of my friend's apartments. It's actually a miracle that she is alive.

 

I was trying to fight for Gracie's life that was full of health issues. I knew if we took her back to the animal shelter, she would be put down. I didn't want that to happen, yet I couldn't handle the 5 medications a day, at different times a day, and the cleaning up after her sickness, etc... plus all the care I had to encounter over my own chronic health issues.  It was too much for me to bear; and I was so worn out. I felt bad but I had to give her to someone who could take care of her with all her health issues. And yes, I made sure my friend knew all the health issues and medications that Gracie was on before she took her into her home.

 

I ended up getting treatment for ringworm, had to bleach my bathroom where Gracie was isolated, had to disinfect my whole apartment again, steam cleaned the carpets with tea tree oil to kill all mites and ringworm, and wash all dirty and clean clothes, linens, pillows, throw rugs, jackets, etc.. in tea tree oil. Thankfully a couple of friends helped me at the laundry mat or it would have been even a longer ordeal.

 

I finally have put all my belongings away, reorganized my place, and am getting my life back to normal. I probably have the cleanest, most disinfectant apartment there is.  I am no longer contagious...yay me. I have dealt with a lot but I keep telling myself it could have been worse. I have grown from these losses and crazy happenings in my life. It was not (and is not) easy going through all that I went through but I have had to keep leaning on God through the process. I also learned  that when I was disinfecting my place and washing all the loads of laundry, that it is just "stuff" and do I really need it all?  I ended up letting go of things. I had too much and sometimes it's time to just let things go. (Now I have that song in my head "Let it Go" from the animated  movie Frozen). 

 

I have done a lot of grieving lately. Not only did I have to say goodbye to Buttons, but I have known 12 people and a friend's animal have died in the past two years. I could only get myself to go to a few of the funerals/memorials because it was too much for me. The hardest was having to let my fur baby Buttons go. I still cry because he was very special to me. I have to picture, in my mind, those 12 people and two animals in Heaven. It's what gets me through it, besides God's strength....I am still looking forward to that big reunion in Heaven where I will see them all, face to face again. Boy, I can't wait to go to Heaven; it is going to be one big family reunion, for me. And for the near future, I'm looking forward to getting a pet companion..
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What was I Doing?

I seem to be doing things like this more often.  I start one task, and while I'm doing that task, I start another task, then another task, and eventually I forget what I first started.

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The other day, I put two of my plants on my kitchen table to add plant food to them. I measured the right amount and added them to these plants. Okay two down, and 5 more to go...

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I then noticed that dry leaves were on the carpet, so I grabbed the vacuum cleaner and pulled out the glass plant table and vacuumed the leaves. I put the vacuum cleaner to the side...

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I look up and there is a cobweb on the ceiling over the plant table. I grab the broom from my kitchen and take down the cobwebs that are in the living room. I put the broom aside...

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I glance down and I see that the indoor windowsill is dusty, so I clean that up...

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I view behind the TV console that is adjacent the plant table stand, and it has a few dead leaves and dust behind it, too. I get the pledge out to clean that up.  I put the broom aside...

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I then observe the mess that I just created. I have 2 plants on the kitchen table, a vacuum nearby, the broom is propped up against the recliner, the dust rags and pledge is on the floor, and the plant stand full of other plants is not in it's regular spot...Wait, what was I doing? Oh yeah, I need to finish putting the plant food in all the plants... What a mess. 

I know I have had some issues with forgetfulness because of a head injury 20 years ago and the past 15 years I have had brain fog due to fibromyalgia, also known as fibro fog. My forgetfulness seems to be getting worse, unless it's because I am getting older. Wow, can't wait to see how I am in ten more years

Fibro Sufferers Have Many Titles

My normal pain day is having chronic pain, from head to toe, due to Fibromyalgia, a head injury from 20 years ago, and a long list of medical problems that even Santa Claus wouldn't be able to remember. With the crazy health issues I have, you may see me do crazy things or talk about weird sensations my body is doing due to Fibromyalgia (Fibro) or another medial issue.  We, people with Fibro, have many titles due to all the symptoms or crazy sensations that we endure. Here is some of what we go through (yes, I did say some, there is a whole lot more of what we deal with):

FURNITURE TESTER. Sitting on a chair or couch is hard because the cushion on the furniture can cause excruciating pain when pressing against the body.  Sometimes I prefer to sit on the floor. For some reason, it's more comfortable, but yet it still hurts. If that makes sense, I don't  know.  I do use cushions to sit on the floor. All I know is that, at times, it is more comfortable than sitting on a chair or a couch. I know it sounds strange. But this is my life. Wooden chairs without padding are the worst. It can shoot pain in places I didn't know I had.

FASHION UN-DESIGNER. There is the lovely added feature of things touching my body causing even more pain. Wearing certain clothes, shoes, jewelry, etc.. can cause pain. Fibro has made me tone down on my appearance.  Now, I tend to wear comfy clothes and supported tennis shoes or sandals. The fancier the clothing I wear, the more pain it causes.  So loose fitting clothes and pj's are a Fibro persons best friend. I didn't know how many comfy clothes I had until I was doing laundry one day. That is when it hit me.  Wow,  I sure under-dress nowadays.

Oh yes, because I have a hard time sleeping, have temperature and hearing sensitivities, and have tremendous pain, I watch my church LIVE on my Roku (where the internet is connected to my TV).  I have the option of  pajama attire for church which is great for me since I have to drag my body from my bed to the living room.  I do desire to go to an actual building and attend the services, but it is not feasible at this time in my life. I am grateful that my church has the benefit of live-streaming and they just started a new Sunday night service LIVE,  so I get to watch two different services on Sundays from my church. It helps make me feel like I am a part of my church since I can't get out much. I guess you can say, my church has the best parking and the "come as you are" motto in tack.

SPECIAL TECHNIQUE HAIR DRESSER. My hair hurts? Yes, you read it right. There are times that it feels like every hair strand, on my head, hurts.  I don't know what causes that sensation, and people may not understand it, unless they experience it themselves.  Even when I go to bed at night, I'm more aware of my hair. I have to place it a certain way when I lean on it against my pillow,  because if I don't, my hair will hurt and the pain radiates to my head and neck. It sounds funny, yet it is a constant pain. I even have to be careful how I place a scrunchie, bobby pin, or rubber-band in my hair.

MAKEUP UNDER-ARTIST. Applying eye makeup is more of a challenge this year.  I started experiencing pain when I would apply eye shadow to my eye lids. I never even thought that eye lids could ever be in pain, until recently. Yes,  I know all this sounds like I may be making things up, but I'm not.  Sometimes I have to resort to just smearing eye powder on my eyelids with my finger because the eye applicator causes a burning sensation.  

EXTREME SENSATIONALIST. The issue of pain sensation on the tips of fingers causes texting or typing, to be hard, at times. Now, they have the swipe features on the cell phones and electronic tablets which is very helpful.  An average person probably doesn't think about their skin that much. A Fibro sufferer is usually more aware of their skin.  It hurts a lot; it itches. We can't take our skin off to relieve the crazy, painful, yet annoying sensations.  A hug or cuddling can cause excruciating pain at times. Clothes or a blanket may make the skin feel irritated. Sitting on a chair can shoot pain down the back and bottom. Sometimes when I sit or lay on the carpet, I get a burning sensation on my skin like rug burns.  I didn't do anything to cause the rug burn feeling; it's just the way it feels. Yet sitting on the floor, at times, is more comfortable than sitting on furniture. So I guess you can say I'm not comfortable in my own skin. 

HYPERSENSITIVE HEAD BANG-ER. I wear ear plus daily because my ears are really sensitive due to higher pitch noises or sounds.  Some people wear them because they are sensitive to lower pitch sounds.  I guess you can say that concerts, movie theaters, baseball parks, race tracks, stadiums, and even church services are really hard for me to attend. You may see me at the grocery store or taking a walk downtown instead of going to other events or even church, but I've learned what I can and can't do. I found new ways to do things like attending church online which connects to my TV. If the music (or preaching) gets too loud for me, it is awesome to have the remote control handy. The days that I do go to a place that's too loud for me, I have to wear thicker ear plugs and still the next few days my headache will increase and may turn into a migraine-like headache.  And that is with wearing ear plugs; the pain is way worse when I don't wear earplugs.

I have learned to keep the TV remote control close by me, not because I like to hog the TV remote, but because I need the volume feature.  I may not realize it, but I might have the TV. or cell phone turned up higher than normal because I am trying to hear the people talk. Yet it is the higher pitch sounds that hurt my ears, so I have to turn the volume down, during those times. I find that the volume is going up and down a lot on my TV. (lol)  Certain sounds especially  musical instruments can cause an immediate sharp pain in my head.  All TV programs and commercials have music or other sounds that I have to turn down the volume to, yet I have to turn the volume back up to hear the people talk. I  hear really well, yet I don't always decipher what people say.  

FUTURE EXTERMINATOR.  The feeling of bugs crawling all over and then the skin itches everywhere.  Nothing seems to relieve the itch. Applying  tons of topical  creams doesn't work most of the time.

HYPERSENSITIVE WEATHERMAN/WOMAN. People with Fibro tend to know if the weather is about to change.  I usually know when it is about to rain or if there is any moisture in the air because my body will be in intense pain from head to toe.  If the barometric pressure or temperature changes,  my body feels that too.  We also deal with hot or cold sensitivities.  If it's hot, I turn on the air conditioner yet you may find me put on a sweater.  People with Fibro tend to be temperature sensitive. When it is hot, I have to turn on the air conditioner. Yet I throw on a light blanket or sweater because when the air from the air conditioner or fan hits my skin, my body starts to hurt more, especially my skin.

Due to Fibro, I get over-heated easily where I feel like I am going to pass out so I carry Gatorade packets, along with water, with me when I go out.  Then recently my body started the change, yes that dreaded peri-menopause I have heard about. The hot flashes and night sweats actually made my temperature sensitivity even worse.  Even when I was in an air conditioned room, my vision would fade and turn black, was lightheaded, and felt like I was about to pass out. I ended up going to my doctor. She ran some tests to be on the safe side yet they came out normal.  She said I'm just going through the change and I need electrolytes to balance my body due to sweating more. I don't need added symptoms, oh well, life goes on....She told me to drink Smart water, with electrolytes, to help my body out. Thankfully, it has been helping. (Please tell me that other women have had a bad reaction to hot flashes besides having to turn on the air conditioner or stick your head in the freezer. Lol) I  just hope the Smart water makes me a smarter person.

So now I have to keep Smart Water stocked. I have also been using Gatorade because it is cheaper, but I dilute it because it has a lot of sugar. So if you see me carrying Gatorade or reaching for some Smart water, now you know. I am just overly sensitive to hot temperatures including the ones in my own body. Crazy me....too funny.

HEARTBEAT NAVIGATOR ASSISTANT. With all that I go through, God is very important in my life.  Some people may think I shouldn't believe in a God who hasn't healed me of all these illnesses, disease, symptoms, pain, or crazy sensations. Yet God  uses it all to keep me close to His heartbeat and to help me encourage others who are going through it too. 

If you (or a loved one) are going through these weird sensations, extreme pain all over, or other symptoms, you are not going crazy. It is not all in your head, and you are not alone... I have been dealing with extreme pain and added symptoms, which includes Fibro for the last 20 years. I lead a Fibromyalgia group called "Fibromyalgia: Fibro Brothers and Sisters" to help encourage others who are dealing with Fibro.  It's good to be a part of a support group so you know you are not alone. 

Here is the Fibro support group: 

 https://www.facebook.com/groups/fibroBandS/  

and here is the page where I give tips on managing pain: 

https://www.facebook.com/teensytidbits

We all could use more people to understand what we deal with on a regular basis.

Silly Brain*

If you have fibro fog or any brain fog this may make sense....

I was with my friend for a few hours yesterday  and I had the hardest time forming complete sentences. Luckily I was tired and got the giggles, otherwise it would have bothered me. I also felt like Dory from "Finding Nemo." I kept getting so easily distracted and my brain felt like it was turning to a mush or a mixed slushy. I couldn't form completed sentences. I kept forgetting what I was saying and the more I thought about it, the worse it got. I would try to explain what I mean, but then I couldn't remember what I was explaining. And no, its not dementia or Alzheimers. It's what we call fibro fog or brain fog.

I kept dropping things, about 4 things to be exact.  Not at home, but right in public.  I dropped my credit card at the checkout, well I think that is what it was. Then I dropped a few things I was purchasing, plus a few things in the aisles.   But that is okay, I didn't break anything, but maybe a little of my pride...

I also kept bumping into things due to the off balance feeling I have. It isn't a pleasant feeling when one collides with a door knob, the wall, or the edge of a table. This isn't done on purpose but somehow my brain is not cooperating with my thought process.

Lately my energy is slow and is trying to catch up, but it's lacking.
Sleep is a joke.
Naps are a must.
Socializing is strained.
A trip to the grocery story is exciting. I try to go to the store before my energy is depleted. It's a race against time, who will win? Me or low energy.

If I say "hiiiiiiiiii," it's  just me, excited to see you, yet I have subconsciously prolonged the word, to try to give me extra time to remember your name. It is stored in a locked file in the abyss of my brain and my brain will not let go of the key. So, I am sorry, if I can't remember your name.  I am grateful that my brain is in my head because if it wasn't, my body would have walked away with a no return address.

And wait!  I am told that the older a person gets, the more their memory disappears. Wow, I can't wait. I'm up for a doozy in the next 10-20 years.

Written on June 16, 2015

I think I should go back to bed

I get out of bed on June 13, 2015 when I wake up to the sound of the rooster crow.  No I don't live near any roosters.  It's just the sound blaring from my alarm on my smart phone.

I walk to the bathroom,  and notice that there is a lot of water on the floor by the toilet. I clean it up and I can't seem to find out where the toilet is leaking but I will find out later that it may be that it's from underneath the toilet.

I walk to my cat,  pick him up and then notice this 92 yr old cat just pooped on me. Yuck. So I go clean (and umm sanitize) my arm. He must not be feeling well,  because he usually uses the kitty litter box.

I decide to cook breakfast.  Realizing my stomach does better if I only eat the egg whites,  I attempt to separate them.  Half of the egg white ended up on the floor. So I clean that up.  Then I get the other egg and attempt to separate it by letting the egg white slide to the other half of one that's in the bowl.  Ugh,  part of the yolk falls in the bowl,  so I try to fish for it and throw it in the garbage disposal.  The next thing I know is that part of the egg white fell into the sink. Oh well, I pour what's left of the egg whites in the bowl into the frying pan to cook. (notice to readers: I do know how to separate eggs,  it's just one of those mornings).

Then I get my gluten-free bread out and noticed that the brand new bread I just bought is missing a half of a slice of bread.  I thought that maybe I dropped the other half of the slice.  Nope, it's no where to be found.  I decide to get two whole slices of bread out   and pop them in the toaster.

While the eggs are cooking,  I grab the toast and burn my thumb from the inside of the toaster.  (If you have ever seen gluten free bread,  for some reason they make them smaller.)

I place my cooked Canadian bacon and buttered gluten free toast on a plate.  I add the egg whites, as well.
Due to fibro fog,  I couldn't understand why my eggs didn't look like much. Oh yeah,  it's because I ended up with 2 halves of 2 egg whites because the rest was in the sink and on the floor.

I bring my food to the table.  Then I go to the kitchen and get a glass of ice cold water from the fridge.  As I walk from the kitchen to the table,  I take a drink of the refreshing water, some of it ends up down my shirt. Brrr it's cold.

I finally sit down to eat my breakfast.  It was good but for some reason I feel exhausted.  I have only been up for one hour; I feel like I should go back to bed.

Brain Fog vs Chronic illness*

You may have Fibromyalgia or other chronic illness if:

You went into a room, and can't remember why you were in there.

You show up to your appointment, and find out you are there on the wrong day.

You know more than the doctors do.

You bring a 5 foot long list of all your symptoms to your doctor's visit.

You eat a bowl of cereal because you are too tired to cook.

You feed your cat (or other pet) and you are too tired to feed yourself, so you sit down on the recliner to restore your energy.

You do your laundry, and then you have to relax the rest of the day because of exhaustion.

You are thrilled to go grocery shopping because that means you got out of the house.

You can identify with seniors and their aches and pains.

You complain more about your aches and pains than the seniors do.

You pick one major thing to do in a day like doing laundry, shopping or exercising. (If you do two of them, you should be proud of yourself yet you may be about to collapse so hang on tight. If you do all three, there's a flareup coming soon.)

You do your laundry, you discover that you have only worn pajamas and comfy clothes all week.

You can't talk in complete sentences half the time.

You struggle to remember what you were talking about.

You totally get distracted.

You wake up in the morning, crawl to the recliner, and take a nap.

You eat breakfast and then take a nap.

You drive and get lost in your neighborhood.

You shop to find the comfiest clothes and pajamas.

You wear comfy shoes or slip-ons.  

You go out and do something fun, then your body is inflamed for 3 days.

You ask a person a question, then a few moments later, you have to ask them again because you forgot what they answered.

You go grocery shopping, and then you are too tired to cook, or eat afterwards.

You think curling up on the couch and watching TV is an exciting evening.

Hugs to all of you who can identify with what I wrote above. Remember You are not alone.

A Beautiful Hawk*

I was so fascinated by this hawk that was flying toward my 3rd story window..
and coming closer and closer.
It was awesome to see this beautiful creature
until I saw what he was holding.....
his lunch...
....a rat....
 a long rat's tail hanging and poking though the claws of the hawk.
The hawk let me peak at the rodent.
Eeeeewwwww that just grossed me out and gave me the creeps.....
he came up to my window to give me a great view
and swooped over to the roof....

I heard there is a hawk nest behind my apartments.
For some reason, I didn't feel like finishing my breakfast

God Used a Cricket to *Save My Life*

In December of 2014, I was having problems with feeling very weak and nauseated. I do deal with Fibromyalgia (Fibro) and a list of other health issues so feeling weak and nauseated is not new to me. Even Fibro sometimes feels like the flu. Yet this was weird because I couldn't get up off the floor of my lounge pad on that Monday.  Usually I can go about doing things a little at a time, but something was different this time.  I thought that it was just another health issue I have to endure so it didn't really bother me too much. On Tuesday,  I felt a little better but I could barely do my laundry. I just sat by the dryer and pulled out the clothes and threw them over my head to the table because I was too weak to get up. I didn't even fold all of them. I don't normally act like this.

On Wednesday, I saw a cricket in my kitchen. I don't like crickets because I have a hard time sleeping with the sounds they make of chirping or chiming in the middle of the night.  I tried to catch it with a cup I found nearby, yet it hopped to the back of the stove.  Grrr, I thought. I am never going to be able to get it. As it hopped behind the stove, I leaned toward the wall to see if I could see it.  All of a sudden I smelled gas coming from behind the stove.

I immediately called the gas company, and sure enough the gas repairman confirmed the gas leak coming through the regulator of my stove.  As he was fixing it, I looked around, behind, and under the stove to locate the cricket, but no luck. After the repairman left, I opened the windows and felt fresh air fill my lungs immediately. I even noticed that my cat Buttons was walking around more after I opened the windows.

The next day I saw the cricket hopping out of the kitchen. I ran to catch him because I didn't want him in my bedroom making those cricket sounds. Yet I felt sorry for him. Poor little guy; I didn't hear him make a peep the night before. He probably felt sick, too, due to the gas leak. It was because of him that I smelled the gas leak, so I decided to capture that little guy and bring him back to the good outdoors where he belonged.  I walked down the three flights of stairs, opened the door, and released him. I gave him a second chance as I got one too.

God sent that little cricket to save my life and also my cat's life. If I didn't see him hop near the back of the stove, I wouldn't have known I had a gas leak.  I have heard people say that animals (cats and dogs) have warned people when danger was close by. God must have a sense of humor, because he sent me a cricket.

CRAZY Circle of Events *

The other day I was trying to get more sunlight for my cat and I so I decided to move a tray table that I use for my plants because it was blocking the sunlight spots in my living room; well I accidentally tilted the tray table, which made the plant fall to the ground, which made the soil fall on my carpet, which made me have to re-pot that plant, which made me re-pot 2 other plants, which made me get the vacuum out to clean up the dirt, which made me notice the dusty inside window sill that was near the fallen plants which I then decided to vacuum, which made me notice the other dusty living room window sill, which made me vacuum that one, which made me think since the vacuum is out, I need to vacuum my apartment.

And all I was trying to do was get more sun on my aching body. 

I learned from my cat, that when I can't get out of the house, I lay in the sunlight because it feels good on my body. He does it all the time, I didn't understand it until I tried it out...lol... it feels good.

Sometimes You Have to Be *Humorous*

I started a pain management class at a Health Facility this week. I don't know what came over me but when I saw a skeleton hanging on a stand, my silliness came over me. I think it happened when I saw a bucket full of funny shaped popcorn. A lady brought 24 clear gloves stuffed with sweet popcorn and tied the ends of them.

Before the three doctors came in to teach the 2 classes I was in, I decided to dress the skeleton... I grabbed 2 gloved popcorn bundles. They looked like hands, so I tied them to the skeleton's hand bones....then I found some pillow cases and cloths in the back of the room. I just draped them over the skeleton because she just looked cold and I added one to give her a skirt. I put a Breast cancer Magnet under her ribcage. The magnet was given to me when I walked in the building.  She needed Hair, so I just draped a rag over her head. Now that I am looking at the picture, I realize I didn't give her a shirt. lol

I did this all before the teachers came in...The students, who were waiting for the class to start, were laughing and said they wouldn't say who did it....The lady who brought the popcorn thought they would blame her.  

The funny thing was, while I dressed the skeleton, it kept falling over because the metal stand that was holding it up, was missing a piece. The more the students laughed, the more the skeleton kept falling. I finally got it propped up just right...then two of the teachers walked in. I quickly sat down.

The teachers didn't even notice it....until.....one teacher, 20 minutes later, had to use it for his lecture...I had no idea he was going to use it. He laughed, and everyone did, as he displayed the dressed skeleton on top of a table. That skeleton was taller me. I just giggled but then I was so afraid it was going to fall.  A lady was going to take a picture of it, so I walked up to fix the skirt that fell.  I noticed that it was stuck underneath the wheels.  I then stopped and realized if I touch the cloth, the whole thing will go down.  Everyone was laughing. It was too too funny.

In the 2nd class, on the same day, another doctor came to teach about physical therapy.  The doctor didn't notice it either until he, too, used it for the lecture.  He laughed as he took part of the clothes off to show us how we need to hold our back, neck, etc... in the right position. Then he laughs and pulls out the big refrigerator magnet that I put behind the chest. He says, "oh, I guess he's supporting breast cancer."  And then everyone just roared in laughter....He didn't notice the popcorn hands yet.  About 5 minutes later, the doc went toward the the skeleton to talk about shoulder blades, and collar bones.  As he lifted the arm up, a popcorn hand hit him in the leg...He laughed...I heard someone say, "that was perfect timing."

I so enjoyed the laughter....and so did the whole class.
I am so glad I was able to make over 20 people, who deal with chronic pain, and 3 professional doctors laugh ..... It was so much fun. Thank You God, that I can find ways to laugh, giggle, and have humor through all this physical pain.

I am so Over the Owls*

Well, today my neighbors said that the screeching owls have moved on. I had to go check it out so I peaked out the window down the hall from where I live. Yup no more screeching sounds. I loved those beautiful owls that I was able to observe for a week or two.

One day, I looked on the sidewalk, and lo and behold, there was a creature sitting there. This brown animal's eyes were looking at me..it wasn't a cat or a dog. I couldn't tell what it was. At first I thought it was a brown owl. That is so awesome but Was it hurt? Why is it on the sidewalk?  Yet it was so cool to watch...It looks so curious with its white face and brown body, just looking around and turning his head from side to side.. Oh I wish I had my camera.  I went and put a note on my neighbor's door and went back to the window and it was gone. I am a curious person, by nature so I had to go investigate that animal.

I forgot I had my camera phone so I got it ready and I went downstairs as fast as I could and out the door to go see if I could get a closer look, but that animal which was about as big as a kitten or puppy was nowhere to be seen...

Then I moved closer to where it was originally standing, and I heard a sound as if something creaked open, then all of a sudden this beautiful brown owl flew about 100 ft away from me, but it was carrying a smaller animal...his dinner....oh gross. I immediately got nauseated and felt like I was going to puke when I saw that animal being carried away to be eaten,,,just the thought of it made me not like that owl any more...I know they have to eat, but that was too much for me to see..

As I walked back to my apartment, I had this bad taste in my mouth, and felt disgusted by the owl....as I am writing it, it's still giving me chills down my spine...I am a city girl...I don't like to think of  animals killing other animals for food....Okay I know I eat certain meats, but like I said. I am a city girl...If I had to kill it, I would be a vegetarian...

so long, furry friend; I hope you had a good life.

I Thank God for All My Senses*

I try to thank God
when I smell something awful,
like sewage or burned popcorn
because that means I have my sense of smell.

I try to thank God
when I see graffiti on the walls
or watch as the thick smog we breathe rolls on in
because that means I have my sense of sight.

I try to thank God
for painful jaw joint procedures
or when I have burnt my finger or had a paper cut
because that means I have my sense of touch.

I try to thank God
for the roaring sound of the ambulances that pass by
or having to wear ear plugs because of my ear sensitivity
because that means I have my sense of hearing.

I try to thank God
for the nasty medicine I sometimes have to take
or of sometimes the awful food that my tongue can't handle
because that means I have my sense of taste.

I may complain at times because of the strange or awful senses I have experienced, Yet I do thank you God that I can smell, see, feel, hear, and taste. Some people are not as fortunate. Thank you God that I have these senses.

I Need Rams and Bulls*

I was reading the first half of Numbers 23:1-3 and I could not help but laugh because of my big, creative imagination. Read this scripture and then I will explain.

Balaam said, “Build me seven altars here, and prepare seven bulls and seven rams for me.”  Balak did as Balaam said, and the two of them offered a bull and a ram on each altar.

 Then Balaam said to Balak, “Stay here beside your offering while I go aside. Perhaps the Lord will come to meet with me. Whatever he reveals to me I will tell you.” Then he went off to a barren height."

etc...

First of all Balaam tells Balak, “Build me seven altars here, and prepare seven bulls and seven rams for me.” First I am assuming he has to get the animals before he can sacrifice them.  I am picturing Balak trying to catch seven bulls and seven rams..  He decides to gather some of his friends to help him. Some of them chickened out and asked, "Are you crazy or what?" Yet Balak insisted that he needed these animals so he can hear from God.

So he gathers about 5 of the strongest men he knows.  

(photobucket.com)

"One by one they capture the rams. Okay 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7...yes they are all here. We have captured 7 rams. Okay now we need 7 bulls." 

He and his friends head over to where the bulls are.

Have you seen a bull lately? They are not the most gentle animals out there. And you must never make them mad, is what I gathered when watching a bull fight on TV awhile ago.  

(wikipedia.org)

Picture Balak getting ready. He has made a loop in his rope and has it ready to catch the big bull. He throws the lassoed rope and misses the bull. He gathers up the rope again and throws it again. Missed again.

The next thing you know, the bull is running towards him. Balak is getting all hot and sweaty...He is gritting his teeth because this bull won't cooperate and he is thinking as he is running down the field: "Man, I have to get seven of these." He yells for his macho friends to help...They are doing the best they can by lassoing their own ropes and swinging them toward the bull. Yet they keep missing.

The next thing you know is that there are 10 bulls running down the field in their direction.  All the men are scattered in the field running for their lives. They each finally get to the same spot, yet out of breath. The older guy asks Balak how badly does he need these bulls...Balak tells him that he really needs them. Another guy pipes in and says that he knows of a place in the city next over where they can buy the 7 bulls. They all decided unanimously that they will just go buy the 7 bulls in the next city over.

Balak finally presents the 7 rams and 7 bulls to Ballam to sacrifice.

I have just given you a picture of what might have happened at the beginning of Numbers 23... Some of the stories in the Bible, we have to speculate what happened because, they do not tell all of the details. Like this story you just read, Ballam tells Balak to sacrifice 7 rams and 7 bulls; he doesn't say how he was going to get the animals that he had to sacrifice. Just picture yourself in that situation and see where it takes you.

The rest of the story you will have to read on your own to find out what happened...

Check out Numbers 23 from www.biblegateway.com 

Enjoying Simple Pleasures.*

The other day there was a post on my apartment door saying that the maintenance would be turning off the water in the building due to plumbing repairs. 
I thought, "no problemo." Yes sometimes I think in Spanish, and every now and then French, Japanese, and Thai. I am a multicultural kind of lady... I learned French in High School; Japanese in, how do you say it, oh yes, Japan. I lived there for under 4 yrs, and then I tried to learn some Thai from my Thai relatives...I can positively say, I wasn't good at learning Thai. lol Just ask my middle niece, she would probably love to tell you the truth about me. She tried teaching me Thai several years back...

Okay so back to my story....I thought I would be okay. Since I hadn't left the house for 2 days or opened the front door; I assumed the post was for that day that just passed.  So after I read it, I wadded it up and went to my neighbor's place and threw it away. No, I don't always throw things away at my neighbor's apartment, but I was on the way to her place after I took the note off my door.

The next morning

...I had to go to the doctor and also go to a shoe store. Well, I jump out of bed to go brush my teeth, and lo and behold, there is NO water coming out of the sink...hmmm. So I try the other sink, which happens to be in the kitchen...and yup, nothing at all...then I remembered that the notice did say that the water would be off on October 16, so I check my calendar...and another "lo and behold" moment happened. Yes, you guess it, it was Oct 16.  

So I am thinking, "man I really need to freshen up and get ready for my appts, and I really could use a shower."....and then a light bulb hits my head...yes in my life, light bulbs don't hover over my head, they hit it...I then remember the "Emergency" water I have stashed in the closet...I try to keep water handy just in case of an emergency...I know in other countries this is not considered an emergency, but it is for me...

Okay so I get a pitcher, a bowl, and the gallon of water out.
I rinse my electric toothbrush, tongue cleaner, and toothbrush for my retainer.
Brush teeth; brush tongue; brush retainer.
Rinse mouth out. 
Rinse toothpaste off of toothbrushes, retainer, and tongue cleaner.

Rinse face.
Wash face. 
Rinse face again.
Cool...no problemo....I am doing good.

So now I move my pitcher, a bowl, and the gallon of water (which is no longer a gallon) to the tub.
I take an old fashioned shower with a bucket of water.
I think, "man, I put too much shampoo in my hair;" it is still too soapy...

I try to rinse hair again. I thought I put pitcher of water over head, but it just poured down the drain. I felt so bad...I need that water and what a waste...that water didn't even touch me. "Waaaaiiiiittttt, I need youuuuuuuuuu..."
Rinse hair again.

There is still shampoo in my hair...
Rinse hair again.
Water all gone...

Man, I don't have enough water to use my hair conditioner treatment. Oh well, I can survive without it today.
I usually use water to rinse tub when I am done...not to mention the drain... I guess it all can wait...

1 gallon of water, completely gone...

I have been so spoiled living in the USA...That's just 1 gallon of water gone and yet it made me think of how much water I usually use when I take a shower, wash dishes, etc...

I remember taking a Mexico trip to Tecate with the Full Service Youth from First Assembly of God church (now known as North Hills). It was hard having the well water rationed at the Orphanage that we helped, for about 5 days; not to mention the lack of plumbing for the toilets. They had around 5 porta-potties outside for us...I do have to confess though, that I did find a running toilet and used it......Thankfully I was able to help clean inside the group homes for the children, yet I saw the other youth leaders and students that I came with, arrive at our housing completely dirty from helping mix cement, or something like that, in the heat of the sun. We all needed showers so we would be fresh and clean for when we would help minister to the people out in the streets in a different part of the city. We weren't able to use the showers because the well was running dry at the time; although, they did let us use one small bucket of water, every other day. And boy, I was thankful for that. You know on that mission trip, someone told me to bring baby wipes because I could use them to freshen up...and boy do they work...I have never forgotten that mission trip about 7 years ago.

Here I am complaining about the 1 gallon of water I had to use the other day because of an inconvenience...yet it reminded me of how thankful I am for all the necessities I do have. I may not own a car or a home, but I have running water, a running toilet, plumbing, a comfy bed, electricity, food for my cat and I, a roof over my head and other things that I enjoy like painting supplies for my art work, dvds, TV, extra pillows and blankets, etc...

Thank you God for simple pleasures...and thank you God, that I live in the good USA. Please forgive me for all the times I complain. Lord, thank you!!!

p.s. To all my friends who have laughed at me for keeping "emergency" water; it came in handy...and I even had the softest hair that day without the hair conditioner.


(This was written in Oct 2012)

Does This Ever Happen to You?*

On Tuesday, I started oil painting a dove while I had the windows opened to circulate the air so I don't intake too many paint or paint cleaner fumes. One of my neighbors wanted me to paint a picture of a dove to represent the Holy Spirit. I thought that was an awesome idea, plus it helped that she's paying me to paint it. Even though I was praising God and praying over this art canvas, I spent too many hours in one day painting. As I finished for the day, I am just exhausted. But for some reason, I picked up a mirror I have in my "art studio" and tried to move it. I say my "art studio" because I have a spot in my living room that I decided is my place to do my artwork and I named it "Expressive Praise" (formerly known as Teensy's Art) Studio. The mirror hit a picture on the wall. The picture fell and collided with my head. So now I think, I definitely have to go to the chiropractor on Wednesday. I was hoping to sleep in on Wednesday, but I had to go to my chiropractor afterall. Luckily I did, because my neck was out of whack and totally had to be readjusted. No problem, this was nothing compared to all the other stuff that's hit me in the head; like the 20 lb box that fell on my head in 1995. For all you new friends of mine, I won't tell you what was inside. lol

On Wednesday, I was standing near the bench waiting for the bus. I purposely did not sit on the bench because there was a puddle on the bench due to the sprinklers. When I saw the bus, I grabbed my bag and walked up the stairs. As I sat down, I noticed I had water dripping down my leg. I knew I already used the bathroom, and I know I don't have a problem with that anyway. lol.  Then I sat down. I wiped the outside of my waterproof grocery bag. A puddle of water is now on the seat and one on the floor. I thought, I must have had my bag on the bench. Then I look in the bag and notice my water bottle's lid was not completely tightened. Oh well, I think. Then I go on my merry day, yet I am kind of embarrassed because it kind of looks like I couldn't wait to go to the bathroom. Oh well, it will dry, I think.

Wednesday night, I have to heat up a hot pack for my achy muscles. So I throw it in the microwave. I timed it for 1 minute...so I thought. I am talking on the phone in my bedroom, and I thought that I am smelling cigarette smoke. But I never smelled it that strong in my apartment before. (I don't smoke, but my neighbor's do). Then it's getting stronger. Than something smells like it's burning. I go to the kitchen that is filled with smoke, turn off the microwave and take out the heating pack. All the rice is charred, stuck together, and is on the outside of the hot pack. I guess it had exploded. So I dumped the whole thing into the trash. Then I realized, wait, I don't want anything else to catch on fire. So I grab it and throw it in the sink and turned on the faucet. Smoke is everywhere now. I am now coughing and trying to air out the smoke. I don't burn food; I burn hot packs.

Then Thursday, Thanksgiving morning, I throw my oatmeal, water, and cinnamon in the microwave as I get ready. I put my apple sauce, almond milk, and almonds in it after it cooks. I eat a couple of bites. Then I notice I have something on my spoon that I didn't add to the oatmeal. I look at it and I am thinking did the pages of my Bible come apart because I see "God" typed on this paper. I keep looking at it and laugh as I read, "Let God surprise you." I just laughed and said, "okay, God, I am waiting." I had previously cut that little sentence out of a magazine one day and placed it on my fridge, but I never knew that it would surprise me and make me laugh so hard. I don't have any idea how it got in my oatmeal but it was too funny.

Today, My friend and I went to the Thanksgiving meal my church provided. We were so grateful that it was actually on Thanksgiving day. It was a delicious meal and the people were so friendly. I was so grateful to be a part of this gathering. After we played games, they let us take home as much food as we wanted since there was so many leftovers. So I piled my containers of food into that same waterproof bag I had on the bus along with my umbrella. My friend and I walked to my house. I carried the food and he carried the empty dishes that I had leftover from the special (non dairy) mashed potatoes and homemade chocolate chip cookies I had brought over to the church for the meal. As I was putting away the food, I noticed the gravy had spilled onto my blue umbrella and down to the bottom of the bag. I rinsed it off and I figured I would attend to it later. Later I decided, that bag has been through enough, so I gave it a farewell greeting to the trash can.

A few minutes ago, I grab my checkbook to pay a bill online. I notice it's wet. I look in my purse and the only other thing that is moist is some important papers. I am thinking "Okay, how did that happen," and then I remember about Wednesday morning. I chuckle a little bit. O well, if I cried about everything that ever happened to me that was unpleasant, I would never want to smile. So now  I have to air out my checkbook and the other papers so they will dry. I still have to keep the windows open because of the paint fumes, and not to mention the smell of smoke that is in my house. The air exhaust fan above the stove is on to take away the smoke smell, the ceiling fan is circulating to help the paint fumes, the air purifier is on to re-clean my air, and one more fan is on to dry the oil painting. Brr and now I am bundled up and want the heater on. lol Anyone know how to get the burned smell out of a microwave? So does this kind of stuff happen to you? lol

Well I had an awesome day on Thanksgiving day. I had a delicious Thanksgiving meal with friends at my church. I even won a prize. It reminded me of that note that fell in my oatmeal.
Even though today was Thanksgiving, it felt so much like Christmas because of the genuine love I felt among friends at church. I am totally excited of all the things that God is doing in my new life. I am enjoying my church family. I am so blessed to have found this church. I am grateful for the emotional and Spiritual growth I had at my previous church and now I look forward to all the great things in store for my new church. and Yes, I will always have crazy things in my life to give me something to blog about; I will always have God loving me; and I will always continue to grow! Thank you God for wonderful memories and crazy experiences in my life. God bless.

My Usual Doctor's Appointments*

Sometimes it just feels good for me to write things out; it is very therapeutic. So here it goes:

The questions you may be tired of answering at the doctor's office and how sometimes you may want to reply but don't because you are too polite.

My sarcastic appointments:


Name? on chart
Medical #? on chart
Age? I am a month older than the last time you asked.
Weight? 110 lbs. (give or take on a lot of factors)
Sex? None of your business (lol) Female/Male? If you can't tell that I am female, you really are the one who needs the doctor
Pulse? yes
Height? Still 5ft (haven't changed since the last time you asked)

Procedures? Read attached medical file
Surgeries? Minor surgery, had 4 teeth pulled out at once
When did you have your last period? Excuse me, that is my business.
Are you Sexually Active? No
Are you pregnant? No, I just said I am not sexually active
Are you sure you are not pregnant? Yes
How sure are you that you are not pregnant? I am a 100% sure
Hmmm? You are kidding me, right?

Are you on any Medications? Yes, remember all the ones you prescribed. Actually, please read attached list
Why are you here? Because I am in excruciating pain everywhere.
Are you in any Pain? Yes, Everywhere
Where abouts is your pain? I just said, it's everywhere
Would you say your pain is all over your body? yes
On a scale of one to ten, how bad is your pain? It's a 10.
Where is this pain that is at a 10? everywhere.
What does your pain feel like? It's excruciating.
So would you say your pain is discomforting? No, I said it is excruciating.
So would you say it is throbbing, sharp, or dull? Who cares; it hurts!
Any sudden bowel changes? None ya business. Do I talk to you about your bowel movements?
Any other medical conditions? Yes, read attached medical resume.
Do you see any other specialists? Yes, the ones the doctor referred me to. Hello are you losing your mind? Please read attached medical resume.
When did you have your last blood work done? The info is in the chart you are holding.

Then the doctor comes in and asks:
"What can I do for you today?"

uggghh