Adventures of Venice Beach in CA

There are a lot of interesting characters that made me laugh a lot, or was it the great weather, hanging with my friend, or enjoying this variety of culture and adventure. This day was fun and yet interesting at the same time....

After about ten minutes of our arrival to the boardwalk which was filled of various shops and vendors, there was a guy trying to lure me into his shop for some "marijuana" that he sold. I declined yet marijuana filled different parts of the boardwalk. I hope there are no affects from 2nd hand smoke of marijuana lol...otherwise I'm in trouble. 

It was so cool watching a guy sing and play his guitar while he was riding his bike.  There was another guy in some creative skates rolling down the boardwalk also playing his own guitar. That was another intriguing moments. Then there were probably 10 temporary tattoo vendors, many unusual and funny shirt shops, and some crude that I didn't like. I enjoyed watching some musical artists including an average looking lady playing a piano that she somehow dragged in for the day.

I saw a guy riding his bike with a platform for his dogs who were sitting right above the front tire. Those dog were so relaxed There were blue haired people, dread locks on white boy's heads, and dogs galore, not to mention the long albino snake on a guy's shoulders that we stayed away from.

There were unusual artistic talents to beautiful artwork pieces. One artist had a painting of a head with all sorts of scenes in that painting. It was amazing.  There were a few musical artists that were passing out free cds of their raegae music and then the next thing you know is you are donating money for a free c.d.

Then there was a freak show about to start where people were paying to go inside to take pictures of the so- called freaks. I realized I couldn't go inside that place when I saw the employees who they considered freaks that were on the steps for advertisement. One lady didn't have any legs, another guy was a little person or what people consider midgets. Another person had basically grown a full beard all over his whole head. I couldn't go in because I knew I would cry due to my grown compassionate nature. I don't think those are freaks; they are people like you and me who have things that aren't the average person. I was thinking about how much God so loved them,

And yes everyone on the boardwalk was a person trying to live their lives in different ways. Some not as successful as others. There were homeless people trying to get a buck from ones passing by, some others may have been homeless but they were trying to sell a piece of themselves in their unusual artwork.

I took some pictures but my not-so smartphone deleted them all. I so wish I had the pictures I took of the huge beautiful waves crashing into the magnificent rocks. It was so breathtaking; God's masterpiece.

It was a great day, and yet I wonder if it somehow changed me....I feel more cultured.

Sometimes You Have to Be *Humorous*

I started a pain management class at a Health Facility this week. I don't know what came over me but when I saw a skeleton hanging on a stand, my silliness came over me. I think it happened when I saw a bucket full of funny shaped popcorn. A lady brought 24 clear gloves stuffed with sweet popcorn and tied the ends of them.

Before the three doctors came in to teach the 2 classes I was in, I decided to dress the skeleton... I grabbed 2 gloved popcorn bundles. They looked like hands, so I tied them to the skeleton's hand bones....then I found some pillow cases and cloths in the back of the room. I just draped them over the skeleton because she just looked cold and I added one to give her a skirt. I put a Breast cancer Magnet under her ribcage. The magnet was given to me when I walked in the building.  She needed Hair, so I just draped a rag over her head. Now that I am looking at the picture, I realize I didn't give her a shirt. lol

I did this all before the teachers came in...The students, who were waiting for the class to start, were laughing and said they wouldn't say who did it....The lady who brought the popcorn thought they would blame her.  

The funny thing was, while I dressed the skeleton, it kept falling over because the metal stand that was holding it up, was missing a piece. The more the students laughed, the more the skeleton kept falling. I finally got it propped up just right...then two of the teachers walked in. I quickly sat down.

The teachers didn't even notice it....until.....one teacher, 20 minutes later, had to use it for his lecture...I had no idea he was going to use it. He laughed, and everyone did, as he displayed the dressed skeleton on top of a table. That skeleton was taller me. I just giggled but then I was so afraid it was going to fall.  A lady was going to take a picture of it, so I walked up to fix the skirt that fell.  I noticed that it was stuck underneath the wheels.  I then stopped and realized if I touch the cloth, the whole thing will go down.  Everyone was laughing. It was too too funny.

In the 2nd class, on the same day, another doctor came to teach about physical therapy.  The doctor didn't notice it either until he, too, used it for the lecture.  He laughed as he took part of the clothes off to show us how we need to hold our back, neck, etc... in the right position. Then he laughs and pulls out the big refrigerator magnet that I put behind the chest. He says, "oh, I guess he's supporting breast cancer."  And then everyone just roared in laughter....He didn't notice the popcorn hands yet.  About 5 minutes later, the doc went toward the the skeleton to talk about shoulder blades, and collar bones.  As he lifted the arm up, a popcorn hand hit him in the leg...He laughed...I heard someone say, "that was perfect timing."

I so enjoyed the laughter....and so did the whole class.
I am so glad I was able to make over 20 people, who deal with chronic pain, and 3 professional doctors laugh ..... It was so much fun. Thank You God, that I can find ways to laugh, giggle, and have humor through all this physical pain.

A Silly Song about Sleep*

I just want some sleep

nothing too much
just some great deep sleep.

da da da. dunt


All I want is sleep.
The kind that you say:
"shh, be quiet...I'm asleep."

da da da. dunt

All I want is good sleep,
that's not fare,
that guy gets it, and he's such a creep.


da da da. dunt


May I have sleep?
Do I have to buy it
and does it come with a jeep?


da da da. dunt


Oh yeah, I need sleep
If you reap what you sow,
do you sow what you reap?

da da da. dunt

Me, oh my I need sleep.
Does it come in a container
or a bottle that's steep?

da da da. dunt


Oh yes, I need sleep.
When I catch it,
May I have it for keeps?

da da da. dunt

Going crazy because I need sleep.
When I get some rest
I am gonna jump up and leap.


da da da. dunt

oooooh yeaahhh, I need sleep
it's got to come sometime
or I am going to weep.

(lol)

I didn't know so many words rhyme with sleep. lol


(picture is of Buttons about to go to Sleep by Tk (Expressive Praise)

Do you ever wonder why?*

Why do bus drivers wear seat belts and no one else in the bus does?

Why do Internet users have to pay to block porn? and why is porn free? Shouldn't it be the other way around? 

Why did the CA zoo pay millions of dollars on an elephant exhibit upgrade when there is a financial crisis and the money could have been spent else where, like on humans?

Why do athletes or movies stars get paid millions of dollars while a teacher seems underpaid?

Why does it cost so much money to deliver a baby yet to get an abortion is inexpensive?

Why do parents get notified before giving shots or birth control to a teenager, but keep it a secret when an abortion is involved?

Why do some people have "dry eye" yet they can produce so many tears (when crying)?

Why do you have to "press '1' now for English" when listening to an automated message when calling a company.  We live in the USA, shouldn't it just stay on English, and if you want another language "press 1 now."

Why is their braille on the bank's drive up window?

Why is their braille on the bathroom door? A blind person still has to search the door to find the braille, and it's not always easy to find?

Who was the first person that invented kitty litter? Was the first domestic cat's potty found in some dusty, sandy pile of tiny rocks?

Why do cans of beverages have serving sizes? Everyone knows that one person will drink the whole can.  Why don't they just say like it is, that the whole can contains 46 oz of sugar instead of 23 oz of sugar yet it is 2 servings. Just say it is one serving of 46 oz of sugar.


Why do we have middle names? Is it only to be used for when we get in trouble as a child?

There are so many "whys" in the world. What have you thought about before? Write your question in  the comment section.

Enjoying Simple Pleasures.*

The other day there was a post on my apartment door saying that the maintenance would be turning off the water in the building due to plumbing repairs. 
I thought, "no problemo." Yes sometimes I think in Spanish, and every now and then French, Japanese, and Thai. I am a multicultural kind of lady... I learned French in High School; Japanese in, how do you say it, oh yes, Japan. I lived there for under 4 yrs, and then I tried to learn some Thai from my Thai relatives...I can positively say, I wasn't good at learning Thai. lol Just ask my middle niece, she would probably love to tell you the truth about me. She tried teaching me Thai several years back...

Okay so back to my story....I thought I would be okay. Since I hadn't left the house for 2 days or opened the front door; I assumed the post was for that day that just passed.  So after I read it, I wadded it up and went to my neighbor's place and threw it away. No, I don't always throw things away at my neighbor's apartment, but I was on the way to her place after I took the note off my door.

The next morning

...I had to go to the doctor and also go to a shoe store. Well, I jump out of bed to go brush my teeth, and lo and behold, there is NO water coming out of the sink...hmmm. So I try the other sink, which happens to be in the kitchen...and yup, nothing at all...then I remembered that the notice did say that the water would be off on October 16, so I check my calendar...and another "lo and behold" moment happened. Yes, you guess it, it was Oct 16.  

So I am thinking, "man I really need to freshen up and get ready for my appts, and I really could use a shower."....and then a light bulb hits my head...yes in my life, light bulbs don't hover over my head, they hit it...I then remember the "Emergency" water I have stashed in the closet...I try to keep water handy just in case of an emergency...I know in other countries this is not considered an emergency, but it is for me...

Okay so I get a pitcher, a bowl, and the gallon of water out.
I rinse my electric toothbrush, tongue cleaner, and toothbrush for my retainer.
Brush teeth; brush tongue; brush retainer.
Rinse mouth out. 
Rinse toothpaste off of toothbrushes, retainer, and tongue cleaner.

Rinse face.
Wash face. 
Rinse face again.
Cool...no problemo....I am doing good.

So now I move my pitcher, a bowl, and the gallon of water (which is no longer a gallon) to the tub.
I take an old fashioned shower with a bucket of water.
I think, "man, I put too much shampoo in my hair;" it is still too soapy...

I try to rinse hair again. I thought I put pitcher of water over head, but it just poured down the drain. I felt so bad...I need that water and what a waste...that water didn't even touch me. "Waaaaiiiiittttt, I need youuuuuuuuuu..."
Rinse hair again.

There is still shampoo in my hair...
Rinse hair again.
Water all gone...

Man, I don't have enough water to use my hair conditioner treatment. Oh well, I can survive without it today.
I usually use water to rinse tub when I am done...not to mention the drain... I guess it all can wait...

1 gallon of water, completely gone...

I have been so spoiled living in the USA...That's just 1 gallon of water gone and yet it made me think of how much water I usually use when I take a shower, wash dishes, etc...

I remember taking a Mexico trip to Tecate with the Full Service Youth from First Assembly of God church (now known as North Hills). It was hard having the well water rationed at the Orphanage that we helped, for about 5 days; not to mention the lack of plumbing for the toilets. They had around 5 porta-potties outside for us...I do have to confess though, that I did find a running toilet and used it......Thankfully I was able to help clean inside the group homes for the children, yet I saw the other youth leaders and students that I came with, arrive at our housing completely dirty from helping mix cement, or something like that, in the heat of the sun. We all needed showers so we would be fresh and clean for when we would help minister to the people out in the streets in a different part of the city. We weren't able to use the showers because the well was running dry at the time; although, they did let us use one small bucket of water, every other day. And boy, I was thankful for that. You know on that mission trip, someone told me to bring baby wipes because I could use them to freshen up...and boy do they work...I have never forgotten that mission trip about 7 years ago.

Here I am complaining about the 1 gallon of water I had to use the other day because of an inconvenience...yet it reminded me of how thankful I am for all the necessities I do have. I may not own a car or a home, but I have running water, a running toilet, plumbing, a comfy bed, electricity, food for my cat and I, a roof over my head and other things that I enjoy like painting supplies for my art work, dvds, TV, extra pillows and blankets, etc...

Thank you God for simple pleasures...and thank you God, that I live in the good USA. Please forgive me for all the times I complain. Lord, thank you!!!

p.s. To all my friends who have laughed at me for keeping "emergency" water; it came in handy...and I even had the softest hair that day without the hair conditioner.


(This was written in Oct 2012)

106 THINGS TO DO* WHEN YOU CAN’T SLEEP*

106 THINGS TO DO WHEN YOU CAN’T SLEEP
All sheep seemed to have disappeared, so no need to count them any more.
(Warning: The author has not tried all items on this list and is not held responsible for any damages that may occur while trying anything, especially if it is done while sleep walking; nor is she responsible for any lack of sleep that may occur or will continue to occur. There is no guarantee that sleep will occur or will be limited or excessive after doing all items on list. Caution: Do at your own risk)...  haha lol 
1. Pray
2. Read Bible
3. Tell God 20 things you are thankful for
4. Do relaxation techniques
5. Watch a boring DVD to make you drowsy
6. Pray for people you know
7. Pray for missionaries in other countries
8. Pray for people in other countries
9. Read a book
10. Drink a glass of warm milk
11. Check your email
12. Check your Facebook
13. Change your Facebook status
14. Check what everybody else’s Facebook status is
15. Write a To Do list
16. Accomplish something on your TO Do list
17. Water your plants
18. Go outside and count the stars
19. Ponder about who made the stars
20. Tell God how much you love him
21. Take pictures of the sunrise
22. Turn on TV and see how many infomercials you can watch in one hour
23. Make your lunch for later
24. Sneak downstairs in the dark and pretend you’re a spy in another country
25. Call someone you know who would be up at this time. Bonus, it could be someone on the other side of the USA or country who you haven’t talked to in awhile
26. Order something online
27. Scrapbook
28. Balance your checkbook
29. Balance your credit card book
30. Write out a budget
31. Watch videos on Utube.com and type in “clean comedy” in search bar
32. Dance a crazy dance
33. Do the laundry
34. Do 20 sit-ups
35. Do 20 sit-ups while singing “I wish I were an Oscar Meyer Weiner”
36. Eat a nutritious snack
37. Write a nice letter (or email) to a friend
38. Make a grocery list
39. Write a goal list for the upcoming week
40. Write a goal list for the upcoming month
41. Write a goal list for this year
42. Write a bucket list
43. Write a Thank you card to someone who has helped you
44. Write Get Well cards to people you know who don’t feel well
45. Take a class online
46. Check how many minutes you used on your cell phone this month so far
47. Check you how many texts messages you used on your cell phone
48. Call the operator and wish them a Merry Christmas
49. Call 1800 4prayer (and say "help, I need sleep")
50. Find out how many ways you can laugh
51. Look in a mirror and make funny faces
52. Floss your teeth
53. Try a new hairdo
54. Clean the bathroom
55. Write a poem of song, and dedicate it to yourself
56. Count how many paper clips you have
57. Clean under your bed
58. Defragment your computer
59. See if your computer’s security system is up to date
60. Make a list of any vitamins or medicines you are running out of
61. Go for a walk (if it’s light out)
62. Clean your bedroom
63. Restock your stapler
64. Defrost your meat for tonight’s dinner
65. See if you can make something with a glob of dried glue
66. Connect the freckles on your arm (or face)
67. Write out your tithe or offering check
68. Count how many times you see the word “and” in the Bible
69. Count how many times you find the name “God” in the Bible
70. Find the word “Rapture” in the old testament
71. Find the word “Rapture in the new testament...just kidding...The actual word “Rapture” is not there, only the meaning. Lol
72. Dust your TV
73. Polish your silverware. If they are not real silver, just shine them with a towel anyway. Still looks nice
74. Do ice or heat pack treatments if needed
75. Organize your bookcase in alphabetical order (no, I haven’t done this)
76. Color coordinate your closet (I seriously used to do this in my early 20’s. Lol)
77. Draw a picture
78. Color the picture
79. Pay your bills
80. Take digital photos of everything you own
81. Delete the digital photos of everything you own
82. Organize your food pantry
83. Set aside any cans of food that could be donated to a community food pantry
84. Straighten the living room
85. Fix any pictures that are slanted by your kids or earthquakes
86. File your paperwork
87. Mend some clothes
88. Organize your miscellaneous drawer
89. Pray for your children or spouse
90. Do 20 pushups
91. Delete any folders or files in your computer you don’t need
92. Erase your old text messages in cell phone
93. Upload pictures from your camera onto your computer
94. Send pictures to your friends
95. Delete the pictures on phone or camera you don’t need any more
96. Add songs to your MP3 player or IPod
97. Play songs from your MP3 player or IPod
98. See how big you can blow a bubble with chewing gum
99. Go through all your clothes, and set aside any that don’t fit anymore and donate them.
100. Type up a prayer to God
101. Write “To God” on the envelope and mail your prayer
102. Count how many times you blink your eyes
103. Take deep breaths
104. Inhale
105. Exhale
106. Slowly close your eyes

Good Night or Good Morning to whichever came first!!!

My Usual Doctor's Appointments*

Sometimes it just feels good for me to write things out; it is very therapeutic. So here it goes:

The questions you may be tired of answering at the doctor's office and how sometimes you may want to reply but don't because you are too polite.

My sarcastic appointments:


Name? on chart
Medical #? on chart
Age? I am a month older than the last time you asked.
Weight? 110 lbs. (give or take on a lot of factors)
Sex? None of your business (lol) Female/Male? If you can't tell that I am female, you really are the one who needs the doctor
Pulse? yes
Height? Still 5ft (haven't changed since the last time you asked)

Procedures? Read attached medical file
Surgeries? Minor surgery, had 4 teeth pulled out at once
When did you have your last period? Excuse me, that is my business.
Are you Sexually Active? No
Are you pregnant? No, I just said I am not sexually active
Are you sure you are not pregnant? Yes
How sure are you that you are not pregnant? I am a 100% sure
Hmmm? You are kidding me, right?

Are you on any Medications? Yes, remember all the ones you prescribed. Actually, please read attached list
Why are you here? Because I am in excruciating pain everywhere.
Are you in any Pain? Yes, Everywhere
Where abouts is your pain? I just said, it's everywhere
Would you say your pain is all over your body? yes
On a scale of one to ten, how bad is your pain? It's a 10.
Where is this pain that is at a 10? everywhere.
What does your pain feel like? It's excruciating.
So would you say your pain is discomforting? No, I said it is excruciating.
So would you say it is throbbing, sharp, or dull? Who cares; it hurts!
Any sudden bowel changes? None ya business. Do I talk to you about your bowel movements?
Any other medical conditions? Yes, read attached medical resume.
Do you see any other specialists? Yes, the ones the doctor referred me to. Hello are you losing your mind? Please read attached medical resume.
When did you have your last blood work done? The info is in the chart you are holding.

Then the doctor comes in and asks:
"What can I do for you today?"

uggghh

A Chuckle with God*

So I am up this morning and it's 3:30 am. I have been awake for about half an hour without sleep. (Yes,I am using up a "spoon" already. If you don't understand, request last post). As I hobble to use the restroom, I look up at my wall and read a mini silver plague that I put on my wall. It's actually a Christmas ornament that I bought a week ago at Walmart for 75% percent off. Hey, that's a bargain: it was only 74 cents, so that was a gift, in itself. Woohoo!!!

The mini plague says:

"Trust - We know and rely on the love God has for us John 4:16."

I decided to look up the scripture. I know I have heard that saying before, but I wanted to make sure it was scriptural. As an adult, I realized a lot of things I thought was in the Bible, were just sayings people had said.

I look up John 4:16. It says, "He told her,'Go, call your husband and come back.'" I just laughed. So many people had that ornament hanging on their tree and thinking that the relying on God verse was John 4:16. I just laughed. Still chuckling. too funny. lol.

It also reminded me of several years ago, when my niece Jennifer was little. We were in my room and she wanted me to read a verse from the Bible. I asked her which one did she want me to read. We decided to play a game; she would point to a verse, and I would read it. The first verse we came upon was John 4:16. I think in a different translation it said, "Go get your husband." We both just laughed. Knowing that I am not married and her and I wanted that dream to be fulfilled one day, we just roared in laughter. It was a memory that I will cherish with my niece.

To continue with the ornament verse, I had to find out where that verse was. I looked up 1 John 4:16:

"And so we know and rely on the love God has for us."  

So the quote on my ornament was in the book of "First John" and not the gospel book of "John"....too funny

I might have got up early due to insomnia, but I had a chuckle with God this morning. Thank you God...

the teensiest Noah's Ark*

Picture yourself over 2000 years ago. Wow, it's mighty hot today....there isn't any rain in sight (unless you are near Oklahoma). Actually the USA had not been discovered yet...
Okay, if I was Noah's daughter...hmmm...I don't think he had daughters...I remember he had sons and some daughter-in-laws and maybe a wife...ah, yes a wife. Okay, forget the daughter thing...pretend I am in Noah's ark and I am his crazy wife. I mean ya had to be crazy to build an ark in the middle of the desert with absolutely no rain in sight. His wife had to support him especially since he was the laughing stock of the desert... Besides what is rain?...

Okay back to this story. I forgot her name, so I will just call her Noah's Teensy wife. I felt bad because everyone in the "Neighbor-HOOD" was making fun of Noah because he was building this great big boat that he said God told him to build...EVERYDAY, people would make fun of him...but I was there to console him and make sure he was okay and that he continued to do what God told him to do. I made sure he was fed and clothed in the best designer outfit robe and sachets that we had...I did notice that his sandles were getting a little worn out when he was doing all that hammering...It was a bit noisy, but I didn't mind since we were doing what God said. I decided to make him new sandles while I made some earplugs for myself, of course...Okay all I had to do was find a sheep, take a clipping of it's fur and stuff it in my ears...WALLAH- ear plugs.

Well, I asked my husband "Noah" where are all these animals going to come from...he said, not to worry, they will come...Build it and they will come...okay, I said. I will trust in God. The closer the ark was about to be finished, I saw some animals coming by my house. At first, they were small, but then I began to worry when the elephants and lions were in my back yard. I yelled for Noah to help me, but I guess he didn't hear me...Oh well, God will help me...

It was time for us to go in the ark and we had a family meeting before we entered it. Noah put me in charge of the smaller animals, Thank GOD!  While in the ark, I just had to take care of the hamsters, smaller cats, raccoons, and other tiny animals. My favorite, of course, were the monkeys. I loved to hold them. They were cute, but boy they sure stunk...yuck...oh, no, I just realized I have to take care of the skunks and porcupines. Wow, I have to keep them separated. God sure has a sense of humor, I thought. God please Help me!!! How long will this journey last?


Can you imagine being on the ark for over a year, 35 days or a week, okay, how about a day in the ark with all those animals? I am sorry, but that would have been difficult for me with allergies and my somewhat fear of rodents. Can you imagine what they did, how they ate, and did anyone get sea sick? 

Okay, the dove came back with an olive leaf or such...we have just landed the ark...now we get to get out...Think of that fresh air they breathed when getting out of the ark. How excited they were to be out of the ark, to do God's will, and to see the beauty after the storm.  Every plant had to be so green and gorgeous, not to mention the sky so blue... fresh, clear air...wow, what a treasure.

I had to write this story because my creative juices started flowing due to being around a lot of animals lately. Just in the last 2 months, I have seen 2 rodents (a mouse trying to get away from little Mark H at the fireworks booth and also I saw a tree-rat jump into a dryer vent while I was house-sitting. He kept sounding like he was coming through the walls. It was creepy).  While house-sitting Pam's house, I took care of her dog, plus a neighbor cat kept visiting. When I arrived home at the place I rent a room, two cats were wanting my attention. One of the cats is a neighbor cat, but she thinks she lives at my place. I have seen Liz rescue a baby bird from the jaws of her cat.  I have watched Liz's cat eat a moving lizard in front of me,YUCK, while the other cat Dutches climbed a tree to catch some birds. I have been near a skunk who only showed himself by his smell. I have heard hummingbirds, woodpeckers, and other beautiful sounding birds. I have seen 3 lizards (well, I think one of them is no longer alive), 2 tiny frogs (yet heard a ton more), a worm, snails, flies, spiders, 2 beautiful butterflies and a partridge in a pair tree...and that's the end of the Noah's Ark.

"Old Sayings" and Funny Quotes *

Teensy Tidbits said...

From Corrinne and Debbie
1. As homely as a mud fence.

2. He's all foam and no beer.

3. She's a few slices short of a whole loaf.

4. He's a few peas short of a casserole

5. He's so mad, he could chew nails and spit rust.

6. He's not the sharpest tool in the shed.

7. If that ain't enough to make a preacher swear.

8. He's not the brightest bulb in the bag.

9. I'm fair to middling (means I'm neither good nor bad)

10. The wind blows like the dickens

11. I have to get my ditties (I have to get my personal things)

12. He put too many pans in the fire (he's doing too much)

13. She wears too many hats (she's doing too much)

14. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink.

15. Old as the Hills

16. The early bird catches the worm

17. Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.

18. What does that have to do with a price of eggs?

19. It's par for the course (nothing different in this day)

From mom
20. She's slow as molasses
21. You can't have your cake and eat it too

From Terry
22. Bologna sausage

From Liz
23. Bologna sausage with sauerkraut and onions!

From Pat and Sam P
24. Putting on the Ritz
25. He's a french fry short of a happy meal.
26. Sometimes a few properly placed words are more effective than quietly moments of prayer.
27. If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.

From Vicky (TB's friend)
28. If a frog had wings, he wouldn't bump his butt.


From Rosemary B
29. When there's an elephant in the house, do you know how to get rid of an elephant? -One bite at a time.

From Dorothy L
30. She has a memory like an elephant.

From Sharon C
31. Ye Gads and little fishes (shocked, O' no)

Here are some I have heard in my life time.
32. He's all that and a bag of chips
33. In your face.
34. He's a few chips short of a full bag.
35. An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
36. Cat's got your tongue?



DO YOU KNOW ANY MORE? PLEASE COMMENT.

How Cute from my Neice!*

My 13 yr old niece said the cutest thing to me today as I was doing my devotional.
She asked me, "If God asked you to marry him, would you? I told her, well he really wouldn't ask me that. Then she said that she knew that he wouldn't ask that question; but continued with "Well, what if he did ask you. Would you marry Him?" I said yes. Then she said "I thought so because He's your kind of man."


Her words were so precious to me.

Ask GOD*

What is the first question you want to ask God when you get to Heaven?

God's Grace*

When and How did you first come to know Jesus as your Savior?

10 Things NOT to do to your Vehicle*

10. Leave oil cap off of engine especially when driving (so it will splatter everywhere)
9. Hold up ceiling fabric with thumbtacks (so when car is moving, they will fall onto your guests)
8. Always zip tie headlights and attach to car (to keep them from falling off while driving. My friend did this to my car because it was an inexpensive fix)
7. Hold trunk open with a broomstick (this is after the hydraulics have gone out)
6. Always fling the gas nozzle toward you at a speedily motion (to give you that clean fresh feeling, like a special deodorizer)
5. Ask a 67 year old neighborly women for help (Peggy had to help me push my car to move it out of the way of oncoming cars when it wouldn't start)
4. Always open the radiator cap in extreme hot weather (for that steamy hot sauna feeling)
3. When raining, slam on the brakes (to get the sensation of a roller coaster)
2. While jump starting your vehicle, always connect both jumper cables together while talking with your hands (to get that electrifying feeling you have always wanted, but remember it can actually cause you to have extreme pain for a week)
1. When your car needs help, Always call me, first.  lol

This is only to be read as a joke and not to be taken seriously. Please do not attempt these at home. I am not responsible for anyone attempting to do these horrible things listed above. I will not be held accountable for you or any family, friend, or enemy. Under law 5 section 2, blah, blah, blah blah blah and you can not sue me for everything I have, because I have nothing..Have a good day.... Ha ha LOL Ha Ha

(I actually wrote this on 8-21-06 because I missed my car that I sold, and yes, a lot of things happened to me when I wasn't thinking clearly on my "bad" days. Maybe that's why it's good for me to be without a car for awhile. If you do not believe me ask any of the youth leaders, old youth pastor Jon, church secretary, or youth at north hills. They would agreeably say it happens to Tanya.)

We (Debbie and I) need your help*

One of my lovely friends, Debbie H and I have agreed that she needs a cool name for her blog spot. (For example, mine is Teensy Tidbits- "Teensy" is a nickname that people call me) She suggested that we ask you all out there for your input. Okay, it has to be an interesting, clean, strong and bold, yet cool. 
Give me your ideas.