Yah, and about that evolution thing, people actual believe that we came from apes or monkeys. You might have come from a monkey, but I didn't. And if we came from monkeys, why are there still some at the zoo? Are we holding them hostage to see if they will turn into a person's son or daughter someday. That just cracks me up.
Anyone that knows me real well, knows that my favorite animal is the monkey, but I know that I wasn't a monkey, never been a monkey, never will be a monkey and my great, great, great, and a million more great grandparents were not monkeys. So stop monkeying around, and get a clue: God created us... God is my true father, not the monkey.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
God is creative*
Yesterday I was cutting open a pomegranate; I was thinking who ever made this fruit is very creative. I was taking out each little piece and placing it in a bowl. I would break apart more of the pomegranate and realize there was even more of those little pieces hiding. As I grabbed one little piece and ate it; I was amazed at how much juice was in that tiny little seed.
It made me start thinking about how creative God is; He made so many different kinds of fruit. He put so much thought into each one, especially the pomegranate. He has made so many things on this earth, plus the earth itself, and everything surrounding it.
God amazes me with all that He does. If I was him, I wouldn't even know where to start to even think about how to make an earth, let alone mankind. Here's a thought: What if I was in charge of making mankind. You think it's bad now, it's nothing compared to it if I was in charge of it. I guess there is a reason why He is God and I am not. He can do anything. He can be everywhere at once, and yet know each individual person personally and individually. That is so amazing to me. I can not do that. I love people but that's just a lot of responsibility, let alone a lot of people.
When I was opening that piece of fruit, it just made me think of how could someone not believe that God exists when he is all around us. He is in the air we breath (yes, even in the smog), he is in Russia, as well as CA, and even all the way to the moon. That would be so cool, to be an astronaut and go to the moon and do your daily devotional or pray and be surrounded by all those stars. That would be so breathtaking, yet I am afraid of heights so you won't see me there anytime soon. Remember that we are surrounded by God and all that He is and all that He does.
God created man. The more I read details of the anatomy it just amazes me how each part, big or small, is connected and for all the different purposes.
How can someone not believe that there is no God? That just stumps me.
God is God.
The end.
-(I dedicate this blog to the 3 amigos: Devin Henderson, Esteban Sandoval, and Kellen Ricker, just because I can and also because they were my former students. All have grown up and recently have started attending different colleges, are still serving God, and I am proud of them).
Friday, October 23, 2009
Chiropractic treatment is working!*
Chiropractic treatment is working! I just know that in my case, it will take a lot of time.
I guess you can say that I have been frustrated because some of my friends and doctors do not think that Chiropractors are “real doctors” or “good doctors,” yet the chiropractic treatment that I have had, has helped. I know I do have these migraine-like headaches still, yet they are not as frequent as before I started this treatment a year ago. I do have fibromyalgia flare-ups often and other intense pain, but I look to the future of it lessening.
I tend to visit my regular physician every now and then for the usual checkups, referrals, or questions that I have. In the past, my regular doctor has done everything he knows how to do for my illnesses and pains and nothing has worked. He has ordered many tests and has treated me with Trigger Point Injections, wellness shots, numerous medications, etc... He has even referred me to numerous specialists for: Fibromyalgia, Rheumatology, Gastroenterolology, Internal Medicine, Neurology, Dermatology, and even a Chronic Pain Clinic... and yet nothing has worked. He has done everything he knows how to do and now he basically tells me to just deal with the chronic conditions. I can honestly say that I am doing that better now, than I have in the past.
Several years ago, the Fibromyalgia and Nutritionist specialists had helped me get on track on how to handle different things, and change my way of eating, which I did, yet nothing else had worked. So I was sent to a specialist at the Chronic Pain Clinic; he said that I was in too much pain and had too many problems and to come back when I am in less pain and have less chronic illnesses. I remember crying back then, but now I can actually laugh.
It figures!!! All of my specialists and doctors say that I am their most difficult patient (meaning, I have many chronic illnesses that are difficult to treat and many medicines do not work on me like they do on most of their patients). Most of my doctors are frustrated because anti-inflammatory medicines make me sick. And now I can’t even get treated at the Chronic Pain Clinic. Wow!!! It is funny; now I can laugh at all of this, when in the past I just wanted to crawl in a cave and cry. Not that I live near a cave or anything, but if I was to have found one, I would have crawled in it and cried, in the past.
Well, this month, I went to my regular physician and he tells me that I look a lot better than I did a year ago. I tell him that for over a year now, I have been going to a chiropractor for treatment and that he even specializes in Fibromyalgia.
He was actually holding his laugh; and looked at me with a condescending look that made me feel like he was belittling me. Yet, I stood my ground and told him that the chiropractic treatment has been helping, yet it will take a while to get well because I have so many things wrong with me. I could tell that he was still holding his laugh, and he smiles this smile that almost seems evil. He says that the Chiropractor can’t help me, yet he just told me I look like I am doing better than a year ago. I tell him that I don’t have as many migraines as I used to because of the chiropractic treatment.
He asked me if I have been taking my Fibromyalgia medicine. I told him that I have not and my friend tried it and she had some really bad side effects. He said, “Well, that’s her, not you.” I told him that I am tired of being medicated, I never started the Fibro meds, and that I got off of two other medications with his approval and another specialists approval. I am on so many different medications that I think some of the medications are causing side effects that I have to get on another med to help with that side effect.
When I left the doctor’s office that day, I thought of what I should have said. I should have asked what he has done to make me well in these last couple of years. He probably would have said that he has already done everything he knows how to treat me, and then I would have replied, “And I appreciate all that you have helped me do, and now it’s my turn to find other options, which happens to be chiropractic treatment.”
I guess you can say that I have been frustrated because some of my friends and doctors do not think that Chiropractors are “real doctors” or “good doctors,” yet the chiropractic treatment that I have had, has helped. I know I do have these migraine-like headaches still, yet they are not as frequent as before I started this treatment a year ago. I do have fibromyalgia flare-ups often and other intense pain, but I look to the future of it lessening.
I tend to visit my regular physician every now and then for the usual checkups, referrals, or questions that I have. In the past, my regular doctor has done everything he knows how to do for my illnesses and pains and nothing has worked. He has ordered many tests and has treated me with Trigger Point Injections, wellness shots, numerous medications, etc... He has even referred me to numerous specialists for: Fibromyalgia, Rheumatology, Gastroenterolology, Internal Medicine, Neurology, Dermatology, and even a Chronic Pain Clinic... and yet nothing has worked. He has done everything he knows how to do and now he basically tells me to just deal with the chronic conditions. I can honestly say that I am doing that better now, than I have in the past.
Several years ago, the Fibromyalgia and Nutritionist specialists had helped me get on track on how to handle different things, and change my way of eating, which I did, yet nothing else had worked. So I was sent to a specialist at the Chronic Pain Clinic; he said that I was in too much pain and had too many problems and to come back when I am in less pain and have less chronic illnesses. I remember crying back then, but now I can actually laugh.
It figures!!! All of my specialists and doctors say that I am their most difficult patient (meaning, I have many chronic illnesses that are difficult to treat and many medicines do not work on me like they do on most of their patients). Most of my doctors are frustrated because anti-inflammatory medicines make me sick. And now I can’t even get treated at the Chronic Pain Clinic. Wow!!! It is funny; now I can laugh at all of this, when in the past I just wanted to crawl in a cave and cry. Not that I live near a cave or anything, but if I was to have found one, I would have crawled in it and cried, in the past.
Well, this month, I went to my regular physician and he tells me that I look a lot better than I did a year ago. I tell him that for over a year now, I have been going to a chiropractor for treatment and that he even specializes in Fibromyalgia.
He was actually holding his laugh; and looked at me with a condescending look that made me feel like he was belittling me. Yet, I stood my ground and told him that the chiropractic treatment has been helping, yet it will take a while to get well because I have so many things wrong with me. I could tell that he was still holding his laugh, and he smiles this smile that almost seems evil. He says that the Chiropractor can’t help me, yet he just told me I look like I am doing better than a year ago. I tell him that I don’t have as many migraines as I used to because of the chiropractic treatment.
He asked me if I have been taking my Fibromyalgia medicine. I told him that I have not and my friend tried it and she had some really bad side effects. He said, “Well, that’s her, not you.” I told him that I am tired of being medicated, I never started the Fibro meds, and that I got off of two other medications with his approval and another specialists approval. I am on so many different medications that I think some of the medications are causing side effects that I have to get on another med to help with that side effect.
When I left the doctor’s office that day, I thought of what I should have said. I should have asked what he has done to make me well in these last couple of years. He probably would have said that he has already done everything he knows how to treat me, and then I would have replied, “And I appreciate all that you have helped me do, and now it’s my turn to find other options, which happens to be chiropractic treatment.”
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
God loves us so*
Isaiah 49:16New International Version (NIV)
See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;
your walls are ever before me.
See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;
your walls are ever before me.
I Will Never Forget You,* Debbie Hodson*
I will never forget you, my dear friend, Debbie.
I am missing you; your friendship, your smiles, and your laughter.
I know you went to be in the arms of God, September 30, 2008. I couldn't even imagine living without you; and yet a full year has gone by.
I know that you would be so proud of me. I can hear you laughing and joking and being so excited of how God has worked in my life these last few months. I have had to do some growing up since you left.
You would have cried with me during some times this year, and yet been so excited with me with the blessings God has given me lately. I can hear you praising God at the fact that I am now working...and it's in the medical field.
Who knew that when I helped you study for your medical exam last year that I would need to know those medical terms now?
I will never forget the day you took me to get a procedure done.
The nurse wouldn't let me go home because every time I looked at you, my pulse would go up. We laughed hard and were trying to keep quiet; the other patients were sleeping in the hospital room. You told me to not look at you, but that just made me laugh even more and then my pulse would rise again.
Then there was that time you took me to the doctors and cheered me on as I had to drink 3 of those chalky drinks. Yuck. We tried working on a Bible Crossword puzzle that was so difficult.When I was done with my appointment, I was impressed that you finished most of the crossword. You then laughed and said that you got most of them from the answers in the back of the book.
I will never forget the times we would go to the health store. You would get your yogurt and I would get mine with soy.
I would buy us those special homemade, healthy vegan cookies and then we would drive to the nearby park and talk as we enjoyed the healthy snacks. We even had many conversations over the phone. We would talk and pray for each other. You gave me great advice and I tried to give you some too.
I will never forget how concerned you were for your family
and how much you loved and cared for them.
Even the times you left the house for long periods of time, you asked me to check in on Corrinne to make sure she was okay. And I did several times.
I remember going to Mark's 5th or 6th grade graduation; you were so proud of him; and I enjoyed watching him present a rose to you that day. I remember when the cancer came back; Matt would enroll in College in Washington.
He was going to wait, but you told him to go ahead and attend.
You cared about him so much, and wanted what was best for him and his future.
I remember going to Melody's outdoor wedding and how cold it was.
It was so nice to see you smile so proudly for Melody and Josh.
I will never forget when we celebrated Corrinne's 80th birthday.
Rob allowed me to use his new video camera. I was having fun recording everyone with my not-so-steady hand.
I even quietly taped you getting the birthday cake ready and then you looked up and squealed. I remember when Rob would give me some rocks that he said had fake gold in them. I would humor him and take them; you just quietly smiled and shook your head.
I will never forget our last Christmas together.
You bought me some polka-dotted, thermal pj's because you knew how cold I get in the winter. You said that anyone who gets up in the middle of the night to pray for people needs to be warm. I told you they remind me of Baskin Robins, which has cold ice cream. brrr
As you gave me that present, you told me you had cookies for me also.
Because I wasn't at church the day you brought them for me, you didn't want them to go bad, so you ate them. We laughed together when you told me about that. You always had a way of cracking me up; also I think one year, you ate my Easter bunny you had for me too because I wasn’t at church. You didn’t want it to go bad either. Now I realize you had a thing for sweets.
I will never forget how four or us celebrated our birthdays together last year.
Jennifer, Penny, you, and I went to Famous Dave’s and had our dinner delivered to us in a trash can lid.
We all laughed, took pictures, ate lots, and enjoyed each other’s company.
We asked the waitress to take our picture together and I didn’t realize that it would be our last picture with you.
I will never forget the first day you were in the hospital
in September of last year.
We bonked heads as you tilted your head to lean on my head;
you told me how to keep on living for God no matter what happens to you.
You told me to be strong and everything would be okay.
You told me you would probably die soon but I wouldn't accept it, until now.
I will never forget how Penny and I were praying for you
and you apologized as you kept falling asleep on that day you were admitted to the hospital. I told you not to worry about it; we will just pray for you.
I remember how Rob would sneak me in your hospital room so that I could see you.
Almost every time I saw you, when you were awake, you would lean your head next to mine.You would smile no matter what state you were in, in that last month of your life here on earth.
One day as I was talking with you, I didn’t realize that you couldn’t see anymore.
You asked Rob, if I was the one with the beautiful brown hair. You would always talk about my hair and how you loved it and didn’t think it was fare that I had healthy hair with all the medications I am on.
I told you I would shave my hair to make you feel more at ease about your hair falling out.
You told me to not do that; you wanted everything to look normal, so I thankfully said okay.
I will never forget your last night here on earth.
Irene, Liz, and I came to your hospital room and quietly prayed with you.
You were sleeping but I knew your spirit heard us.
I noticed your breathing was different and I called the nurse.
As we waited, Irene quietly sang a song to you; I felt someone pass by me, but no one was behind me. Then Liz saw a vision of you joyfully going to heaven, and we realized later that, at that time, that is when you had entered heaven. I had a hard time that night and the months to follow.
The nurse let us say goodbye to you. When I hugged you, I noticed it was different; it wasn’t you anymore. Your spirit had gone to heaven; your physical body had died. You were no longer there.
I called our pastor and he came that night to the hospital to console us.
Liz, Irene, and I left the hospital teary-eyed, yet praising God for we knew exactly where you were. We knew that we felt God’s spirit and presence that night. God made it a special night for us.
You are still with our Heavenly Father, who we live for and will someday be able to see His face like you do right now. I am grateful you are in Heaven, in a better place without sickness or pain. I thank God that He allowed me to spend those years with you on this earth and I will take what you taught me and teach others.
I will never forget you, my dear friend Debbie.
Love you sista
I am so glad God brought you into my life.
I am missing you; your friendship, your smiles, and your laughter.
I know you went to be in the arms of God, September 30, 2008. I couldn't even imagine living without you; and yet a full year has gone by.
I know that you would be so proud of me. I can hear you laughing and joking and being so excited of how God has worked in my life these last few months. I have had to do some growing up since you left.
You would have cried with me during some times this year, and yet been so excited with me with the blessings God has given me lately. I can hear you praising God at the fact that I am now working...and it's in the medical field.
Who knew that when I helped you study for your medical exam last year that I would need to know those medical terms now?
I will never forget the day you took me to get a procedure done.
The nurse wouldn't let me go home because every time I looked at you, my pulse would go up. We laughed hard and were trying to keep quiet; the other patients were sleeping in the hospital room. You told me to not look at you, but that just made me laugh even more and then my pulse would rise again.
Then there was that time you took me to the doctors and cheered me on as I had to drink 3 of those chalky drinks. Yuck. We tried working on a Bible Crossword puzzle that was so difficult.When I was done with my appointment, I was impressed that you finished most of the crossword. You then laughed and said that you got most of them from the answers in the back of the book.
I will never forget the times we would go to the health store. You would get your yogurt and I would get mine with soy.
I would buy us those special homemade, healthy vegan cookies and then we would drive to the nearby park and talk as we enjoyed the healthy snacks. We even had many conversations over the phone. We would talk and pray for each other. You gave me great advice and I tried to give you some too.
I will never forget how concerned you were for your family
and how much you loved and cared for them.
Even the times you left the house for long periods of time, you asked me to check in on Corrinne to make sure she was okay. And I did several times.
I remember going to Mark's 5th or 6th grade graduation; you were so proud of him; and I enjoyed watching him present a rose to you that day. I remember when the cancer came back; Matt would enroll in College in Washington.
He was going to wait, but you told him to go ahead and attend.
You cared about him so much, and wanted what was best for him and his future.
I remember going to Melody's outdoor wedding and how cold it was.
It was so nice to see you smile so proudly for Melody and Josh.
I will never forget when we celebrated Corrinne's 80th birthday.
Rob allowed me to use his new video camera. I was having fun recording everyone with my not-so-steady hand.
I even quietly taped you getting the birthday cake ready and then you looked up and squealed. I remember when Rob would give me some rocks that he said had fake gold in them. I would humor him and take them; you just quietly smiled and shook your head.
I will never forget our last Christmas together.
You bought me some polka-dotted, thermal pj's because you knew how cold I get in the winter. You said that anyone who gets up in the middle of the night to pray for people needs to be warm. I told you they remind me of Baskin Robins, which has cold ice cream. brrr
As you gave me that present, you told me you had cookies for me also.
Because I wasn't at church the day you brought them for me, you didn't want them to go bad, so you ate them. We laughed together when you told me about that. You always had a way of cracking me up; also I think one year, you ate my Easter bunny you had for me too because I wasn’t at church. You didn’t want it to go bad either. Now I realize you had a thing for sweets.
I will never forget how four or us celebrated our birthdays together last year.
Jennifer, Penny, you, and I went to Famous Dave’s and had our dinner delivered to us in a trash can lid.
We all laughed, took pictures, ate lots, and enjoyed each other’s company.
We asked the waitress to take our picture together and I didn’t realize that it would be our last picture with you.
I will never forget the first day you were in the hospital
in September of last year.
We bonked heads as you tilted your head to lean on my head;
you told me how to keep on living for God no matter what happens to you.
You told me to be strong and everything would be okay.
You told me you would probably die soon but I wouldn't accept it, until now.
I will never forget how Penny and I were praying for you
and you apologized as you kept falling asleep on that day you were admitted to the hospital. I told you not to worry about it; we will just pray for you.
I remember how Rob would sneak me in your hospital room so that I could see you.
Almost every time I saw you, when you were awake, you would lean your head next to mine.You would smile no matter what state you were in, in that last month of your life here on earth.
One day as I was talking with you, I didn’t realize that you couldn’t see anymore.
You asked Rob, if I was the one with the beautiful brown hair. You would always talk about my hair and how you loved it and didn’t think it was fare that I had healthy hair with all the medications I am on.
I told you I would shave my hair to make you feel more at ease about your hair falling out.
You told me to not do that; you wanted everything to look normal, so I thankfully said okay.
I will never forget your last night here on earth.
Irene, Liz, and I came to your hospital room and quietly prayed with you.
You were sleeping but I knew your spirit heard us.
I noticed your breathing was different and I called the nurse.
As we waited, Irene quietly sang a song to you; I felt someone pass by me, but no one was behind me. Then Liz saw a vision of you joyfully going to heaven, and we realized later that, at that time, that is when you had entered heaven. I had a hard time that night and the months to follow.
The nurse let us say goodbye to you. When I hugged you, I noticed it was different; it wasn’t you anymore. Your spirit had gone to heaven; your physical body had died. You were no longer there.
I called our pastor and he came that night to the hospital to console us.
Liz, Irene, and I left the hospital teary-eyed, yet praising God for we knew exactly where you were. We knew that we felt God’s spirit and presence that night. God made it a special night for us.
You are still with our Heavenly Father, who we live for and will someday be able to see His face like you do right now. I am grateful you are in Heaven, in a better place without sickness or pain. I thank God that He allowed me to spend those years with you on this earth and I will take what you taught me and teach others.
I will never forget you, my dear friend Debbie.
Love you sista
I am so glad God brought you into my life.
Friday, September 18, 2009
Contentment*
I shall be content
through doctor’s appointments, blood tests, MRI’s, EKG’s and physical examinations;
through medications, ultrasounds, wellness shots, physical therapy, and neck and back adjustments;
through electric stimulation, deep massage, posture pro, and trigger point injections.
I shall be content
through no sleep to restless sleep, dropping things, forgetfulness, and lightheadedness;
through muscle spasms, daily headaches, ongoing stomach issues, and lack of energy;
through allergic reactions, cervical vertigo, sensitive hearing, and even silent illnesses.
I have slowly learned to be content
through having an income to low income and being on a lowered income of SSA Disability;
through ongoing medical-life adjustments, benefits taken away, and finances becoming even tighter;
through two to five doctor’s appointments a week to learning to become a patient - patient.
I am learning to be content
through God who is my ultimate Father, my companion, my guide, and my counselor;
through God who is faithful, compassionate, kind, omnipotent, and omniscient;
through God who understands, is lovable, and is one who is always here with me.
I am learning to be content
through God’s closeness, companionship, ultimate strength, His amazing grace and mercy;
through God’s blessings, patience, unconditional love and His total understanding of me;
through God’s beautiful presence, awesome friendship, and His ultimate being.
I can not live without God's help
through doctor’s appointments, blood tests, MRI’s, EKG’s and physical examinations;
through medications, ultrasounds, wellness shots, physical therapy, and neck and back adjustments;
through electric stimulation, deep massage, posture pro, and trigger point injections.
I shall be content
through no sleep to restless sleep, dropping things, forgetfulness, and lightheadedness;
through muscle spasms, daily headaches, ongoing stomach issues, and lack of energy;
through allergic reactions, cervical vertigo, sensitive hearing, and even silent illnesses.
I have slowly learned to be content
through having an income to low income and being on a lowered income of SSA Disability;
through ongoing medical-life adjustments, benefits taken away, and finances becoming even tighter;
through two to five doctor’s appointments a week to learning to become a patient - patient.
I am learning to be content
through God who is my ultimate Father, my companion, my guide, and my counselor;
through God who is faithful, compassionate, kind, omnipotent, and omniscient;
through God who understands, is lovable, and is one who is always here with me.
I am learning to be content
through God’s closeness, companionship, ultimate strength, His amazing grace and mercy;
through God’s blessings, patience, unconditional love and His total understanding of me;
through God’s beautiful presence, awesome friendship, and His ultimate being.
I can not live without God's help
God's Beautiful Masterpiece*
I have one of my grandmother’s paintings handed down to me from my mother. I have had it for many years and recently noticed a yellow film coating the painting. A friend of mine told me how to restore the painting by using cotton balls, dish soap and water.
As I gently cleaned the delicate picture, I began to see beautiful bright colors come from the flowers that surrounded the bird. The vibrant colors of pink, yellow, blue, and green popped out as though I had just painted it myself. As the first layer of yellow film began to disappear, I noticed the strokes of the paintbrush embedded in the paint. I traced them with my finger and wondered what she was thinking and how was her life at the moment she painted this beautiful picture. What was on her mind the moment she stroked the brush against the canvas?
The original painting was so much more vibrant when the yellow coating was cleaned up. I had to let it dry completely before I am able to take the 2nd layer of the yellow film off. I guess you can say that it’s a process to clean an old and delicate picture.
The process of cleaning the picture reminds me of how God is with us. Every one of us is His original paintings. He brushed each stroke of our body and our lives; we are in the palm of His hands.
We were born into sin and this sin has put an ugly film over us which makes it hard to see God’s original work. When we acknowledge and accept Jesus Christ as our Savior, He completely cleans off the yellow film of sin from us and we begin to see God’s masterpiece.
Even when we are Christians, sin sometimes builds up. We have to continually go to Jesus Christ for him to cleanse us and make us more beautiful, God's beautiful masterpiece.
As I gently cleaned the delicate picture, I began to see beautiful bright colors come from the flowers that surrounded the bird. The vibrant colors of pink, yellow, blue, and green popped out as though I had just painted it myself. As the first layer of yellow film began to disappear, I noticed the strokes of the paintbrush embedded in the paint. I traced them with my finger and wondered what she was thinking and how was her life at the moment she painted this beautiful picture. What was on her mind the moment she stroked the brush against the canvas?
The original painting was so much more vibrant when the yellow coating was cleaned up. I had to let it dry completely before I am able to take the 2nd layer of the yellow film off. I guess you can say that it’s a process to clean an old and delicate picture.
The process of cleaning the picture reminds me of how God is with us. Every one of us is His original paintings. He brushed each stroke of our body and our lives; we are in the palm of His hands.
We were born into sin and this sin has put an ugly film over us which makes it hard to see God’s original work. When we acknowledge and accept Jesus Christ as our Savior, He completely cleans off the yellow film of sin from us and we begin to see God’s masterpiece.
Even when we are Christians, sin sometimes builds up. We have to continually go to Jesus Christ for him to cleanse us and make us more beautiful, God's beautiful masterpiece.
Monday, August 24, 2009
How Does God Answer Prayers?*
Jesus Christ knew what He came down on earth for. He knew in advance what He was going to accomplish, who He would come in contact with, and how His life would end. He knew He would be beaten, mocked, cursed at, ridiculed, and then crucified. Even when He knew what was going to happen, He didn't run away or hide. Jesus Christ kept doing what He was supposed to do; He obeyed His Father and did His will.
Jesus spent a lot of time with the 12 disciples whom He mentored. He didn't rub it in their face and say, "Because all of the bad things you and everyone in the world has done, I have to be crucified and go through a lot of anguish..." No he didn't say that. He didn't even throw a pity party and say, "woe is me." He felt total compassion for them and the generations to come, which includes you and I.
Jesus brought the disciples with Him to Gethsemane and asked them to sit while He walked away from them to pray; He had Peter, James, and John go with Him. I think He chose those three to go with them for support and He just needed His close friends by Him. Remember this Jesus (who is also God) is in human form when He was on this earth. He felt pain and emotions just like you and I do.
Suddenly the weight of this heavy burden was on His shoulders; He began to be sorrowful and troubled and told them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death; stay here and keep watch with me."
When He was in the garden praying, He fell on His face and cried out to his Father (God). I think he was probably feeling very "alone" at this moment. He cried out,
"My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will." He not only prayed this once, but three times.
He knew what He was about to go through; I think perhaps He was hoping that His Father would change His mind and not have Him go through the suffering He was about to go through. He knew that God could take this from Him in an instant. He had seen people healed of leprosy, others raised from the dead, and even demons being cast out of people. So why did His Father, God, not answer His prayer the way He wanted it to be answered? Why was this time different? Surely God could change His mind; surely God could find another way to take away the sins of the world. But God knew best.
As Jesus prayed and felt so heavy and burdened down, an angel came to Him and strengthened Him. There are so many times in our own lives when we are going through tough times, that God may send an angel to help us or strengthen us.
Jesus was in so much anguish about what He was going to do that while He prayed, His sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground. He was basically in turmoil. He prayed again: "Not my Will, but Yours." He had put His feelings and emotions aside, and told His Father that He would go through with it because He knew it's what His Father wanted Him to do.
I can imagine that maybe Jesus' mother quietly begged God, "God, please don't let Jesus die; don't let my baby go through pain or sorrow. You know He has served you wholeheartedly; He was a good boy and has grown up to be a godly man. Please take this from Him. Please God, Please." And why wasn't her prayer answered? Have you ever prayed that kind of prayer for someone you loved who was going through cancer, who was on their death bed, or who has diabetes, or some other illness. Why doesn't God answer the prayer? (Why doesn't He do what "I" think is best?) Hmmm.
I am in a growing time in my life; a time where I am learning more about God and how He answers prayer. I've always prayed a certain way when it came to praying for people. I've had faith to see people healed and a lot have not been healed, including myself. I've had faith to have a lot of prayer requests answered, my way, but a lot did not happen. I have always heard that God answers prayers by "Yes, No, or Maybe". I didn't totally understand that, until now. See, I am a person who wants to see others healed, blessed, and loved. I want to see great things happen, and not bad. I want God to answer all the prayer needs the way I think they should be, but guess what? He doesn't. But, Why? Because we don't know the outcome. We don't know that if our friend dies of cancer, than maybe her family will draw closer to God, or if a person loses their house, they possibly need to learn how to trust God more, or if a person has an injury, that even though they will be suffering physically, they will draw closer to God. See, we don't know the outcome...but God does...He knows what is best.
So when you pray: even though you are praying with all your might that your need will be met, and even though you have so much anguish that your sweat becomes blood, remember to pray what you want, but then pray that God's will, will be done. It might be the best thing that has ever happened to that person you are praying for. If God answered (my imagined) prayer of Jesus' mother, that God would not let Jesus die, than we would never have a savior. If the Father, God, answered Jesus' prayer and said, "Okay Jesus, I will not have you die on the cross," we would have no one to cover our sins. So as the old saying goes, "What would Jesus Do? Well, He would say "Father, not my will, but yours."
I know, this is easier said than done, so allow God to speak to your heart as He has mine. This is hard for me too, but I so want to do the will of God, and there are so many times, my will gets in the way.
..If you are praying for me, it's okay to pray for God's will for my life.
Oh by the way, after Jesus died on the cross, He rose again!!! He is ALIVE!!!
References: Matthew 26:36-46, Luke 22:39-46
Jesus spent a lot of time with the 12 disciples whom He mentored. He didn't rub it in their face and say, "Because all of the bad things you and everyone in the world has done, I have to be crucified and go through a lot of anguish..." No he didn't say that. He didn't even throw a pity party and say, "woe is me." He felt total compassion for them and the generations to come, which includes you and I.
Jesus brought the disciples with Him to Gethsemane and asked them to sit while He walked away from them to pray; He had Peter, James, and John go with Him. I think He chose those three to go with them for support and He just needed His close friends by Him. Remember this Jesus (who is also God) is in human form when He was on this earth. He felt pain and emotions just like you and I do.
Suddenly the weight of this heavy burden was on His shoulders; He began to be sorrowful and troubled and told them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death; stay here and keep watch with me."
When He was in the garden praying, He fell on His face and cried out to his Father (God). I think he was probably feeling very "alone" at this moment. He cried out,
"My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will." He not only prayed this once, but three times.
He knew what He was about to go through; I think perhaps He was hoping that His Father would change His mind and not have Him go through the suffering He was about to go through. He knew that God could take this from Him in an instant. He had seen people healed of leprosy, others raised from the dead, and even demons being cast out of people. So why did His Father, God, not answer His prayer the way He wanted it to be answered? Why was this time different? Surely God could change His mind; surely God could find another way to take away the sins of the world. But God knew best.
As Jesus prayed and felt so heavy and burdened down, an angel came to Him and strengthened Him. There are so many times in our own lives when we are going through tough times, that God may send an angel to help us or strengthen us.
Jesus was in so much anguish about what He was going to do that while He prayed, His sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground. He was basically in turmoil. He prayed again: "Not my Will, but Yours." He had put His feelings and emotions aside, and told His Father that He would go through with it because He knew it's what His Father wanted Him to do.
I can imagine that maybe Jesus' mother quietly begged God, "God, please don't let Jesus die; don't let my baby go through pain or sorrow. You know He has served you wholeheartedly; He was a good boy and has grown up to be a godly man. Please take this from Him. Please God, Please." And why wasn't her prayer answered? Have you ever prayed that kind of prayer for someone you loved who was going through cancer, who was on their death bed, or who has diabetes, or some other illness. Why doesn't God answer the prayer? (Why doesn't He do what "I" think is best?) Hmmm.
I am in a growing time in my life; a time where I am learning more about God and how He answers prayer. I've always prayed a certain way when it came to praying for people. I've had faith to see people healed and a lot have not been healed, including myself. I've had faith to have a lot of prayer requests answered, my way, but a lot did not happen. I have always heard that God answers prayers by "Yes, No, or Maybe". I didn't totally understand that, until now. See, I am a person who wants to see others healed, blessed, and loved. I want to see great things happen, and not bad. I want God to answer all the prayer needs the way I think they should be, but guess what? He doesn't. But, Why? Because we don't know the outcome. We don't know that if our friend dies of cancer, than maybe her family will draw closer to God, or if a person loses their house, they possibly need to learn how to trust God more, or if a person has an injury, that even though they will be suffering physically, they will draw closer to God. See, we don't know the outcome...but God does...He knows what is best.
So when you pray: even though you are praying with all your might that your need will be met, and even though you have so much anguish that your sweat becomes blood, remember to pray what you want, but then pray that God's will, will be done. It might be the best thing that has ever happened to that person you are praying for. If God answered (my imagined) prayer of Jesus' mother, that God would not let Jesus die, than we would never have a savior. If the Father, God, answered Jesus' prayer and said, "Okay Jesus, I will not have you die on the cross," we would have no one to cover our sins. So as the old saying goes, "What would Jesus Do? Well, He would say "Father, not my will, but yours."
I know, this is easier said than done, so allow God to speak to your heart as He has mine. This is hard for me too, but I so want to do the will of God, and there are so many times, my will gets in the way.
..If you are praying for me, it's okay to pray for God's will for my life.
Oh by the way, after Jesus died on the cross, He rose again!!! He is ALIVE!!!
References: Matthew 26:36-46, Luke 22:39-46
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Just Pondering about God*
I sit here pondering about God and what he is up to. This great big round ball we live in is a pin drop in His eyes. So many people, so many requests. How does he deal with all the needs, of all the people? How does He not go so crazy as we would, if we had to listen to all the needs of the world? Yet He knows every need and every person on this vast earth. He knows who is doing what, when, and how they will accomplish things even 100 yrs from now. He knows what it is like to be the only one on this earth for no one created Him; he always existed. He knows even how quiet it was before he made man on this earth and all creation. Billions and billions of people buzzing around like in a bee hive or in an ant hill, in this great, tremendous earth. How in the world does God handle it all? How can he know my need and yet know billions of others and deal with each one personally? I don't understand it all. I just know he does it all!!! Hmmm...makes me want to ponder even more...Picture is by Expressive Praise
Sunday, April 26, 2009
God is the ROCK*
God welcomes the hurting.
God whispers your name, he knows your pain.
It's hard to see the plan of God when going through hard times and losses.
There are rocks in the road and disappointments. Have you lost hope?
Jesus wants to walk with us, through this road.
God wants to hold us in our life and say there is hope.
God IS the rock.
Find hope in Him.
He is God; what are you going to do about it!!!
some key points from sermon notes from April 12, 09
God whispers your name, he knows your pain.
It's hard to see the plan of God when going through hard times and losses.
There are rocks in the road and disappointments. Have you lost hope?
Jesus wants to walk with us, through this road.
God wants to hold us in our life and say there is hope.
God IS the rock.
Find hope in Him.
He is God; what are you going to do about it!!!
some key points from sermon notes from April 12, 09
Getting Activated *
Remember I am significant and important to eternity.
What is it that God wants with me?
Read Exodus 1:1-14
1) God favors the oppressed We have a little bit of eternity in us. We are most like our Father God when we take care of the powerless. (We need to help others) 2) God incarnates His answers. (Exodus 2:1) God made Moses to help with the answers for that time. What you are going to do, has to do with what God has done to prepare you. For example: schooling, life experiences, skills you have had, etc... When you are activated by God, everything you do is easier. You can even do hard work and feel light about it on your feet. For example: setting up for church each week can get tiresome, but when God activates you, it will be enjoyable. There is joy in freedom- freedom in God Do what God made you to do and you'll have joy.
(sermon notes, April 26, 09)
What is it that God wants with me?
Read Exodus 1:1-14
1) God favors the oppressed We have a little bit of eternity in us. We are most like our Father God when we take care of the powerless. (We need to help others) 2) God incarnates His answers. (Exodus 2:1) God made Moses to help with the answers for that time. What you are going to do, has to do with what God has done to prepare you. For example: schooling, life experiences, skills you have had, etc... When you are activated by God, everything you do is easier. You can even do hard work and feel light about it on your feet. For example: setting up for church each week can get tiresome, but when God activates you, it will be enjoyable. There is joy in freedom- freedom in God Do what God made you to do and you'll have joy.
(sermon notes, April 26, 09)
Monday, February 9, 2009
Pondering about the economy*, clinging more to God*
I just had to write a blog because I feel mostly for my friends who have families and are struggling way more than I. People are losing their jobs by either getting laid-off or being fired if they don't resign. I know so many people who have lost their jobs within the last year and it seems like it's getting worse.
Everyone is even dealing with the shock of the cost of living rising. I went shopping the other day and was shocked as the prices keep climbing. I usually have to buy the costly $3.00 whole wheat bread because it's better for me; but now that $3.00 has turned to almost $5.00 now, even the $1.95 toothpaste I used to get has been raised a dollar and forget the fact that I buy 2 different kinds, one regular and one for sensitive teeth. The Sensodyne which is usually costly for me has doubled in price. I found it for $6.00; I decided to wait until I find it cheaper somewhere else.
When I shop, I have to really focus on, do I really need this item that I am about to buy because I can save that money and it will help the rising grocery bill. Then there are the companies that do the unthinkable and decide to raise electric, gas, or water and you can't live without those, so they usually get their money.
The city I live in, is looking scarce in some areas because of businesses' closing. People can't afford to pay for the extra expense on the own business, let alone on their house. It saddens me to see this happen because I know with each business that has closed, there are people hurting, and each of those people have families who have to eat, buy what they need, and just survive.
A couple of months ago, when I went to the Post Office, I asked a person there if stamps would go up in price within the next few months, They reassured me that it would not happen. On the news yesterday,I heard that stamps will go up 2 more cents to equal .44 cents. I know that it is just a few cents, but those cents add up. I decided from that point on, to buy the forever stamps only because even if I bought the forever stamp at .40 cents, I can use it now for the .42 cent stamp and I don't have to add any more postage. Well, you might want to buy more stamps because in May, stamps will be raised to .44 cents. Not only is the economy in the United States not doing well, they announce that California is in a financial crisis. Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger is doing all he can to cut the financial problems. He even said he may cut the unemployment payments or put it on hold for awhile. I can not imagine how my friends who were laid-off from their jobs because of the economy, and now won't be able to afford to eat if their unemployment is cut. There are so many people looking for jobs, yet there is not jobs to be found. I did find one job at a place near my doctor named YESCO. Check it online to see what it is.
I have another friend who had to foreclose on their house and when the White House promised that bailout money would go to banks to help people who lost their homes, the bank would not help my friends. It is a devastated time for them and are trying to make the best of it. Their family of four had to move in with a relative and that has happened to several of my friends. It not only reminds me of the "end times," it also reminds me of the Bible days when there was a great famine in Egypt and people could not even afford to eat. They had to sell their homes and land in exchange for food from Pharoah. (Genesis chapters 41-42 and chapter 47:20-26). I often wonder if something like that will happen here. I wonder if because people can't afford their homes, they can't find jobs, and they can't afford food, etc... Will we get to the point where we are so desperate for food and survival that we would sell our items to the government in exchange for food .
"Joseph said to the people, 'Now that I have bought you and your land today for Pharoah, here is seed for you so you can plant the ground...'" (Nothing may happen at all; I just keep thinking about the Bible during those hard times for those people in surrounding areas near Egypt.)
I want to encourage you to look to God during this very crucial time in the United States. It is easy to worry about everything, but try to remember God sees all and knows all; he is greater than the government or the economy.
Everyone is even dealing with the shock of the cost of living rising. I went shopping the other day and was shocked as the prices keep climbing. I usually have to buy the costly $3.00 whole wheat bread because it's better for me; but now that $3.00 has turned to almost $5.00 now, even the $1.95 toothpaste I used to get has been raised a dollar and forget the fact that I buy 2 different kinds, one regular and one for sensitive teeth. The Sensodyne which is usually costly for me has doubled in price. I found it for $6.00; I decided to wait until I find it cheaper somewhere else.
When I shop, I have to really focus on, do I really need this item that I am about to buy because I can save that money and it will help the rising grocery bill. Then there are the companies that do the unthinkable and decide to raise electric, gas, or water and you can't live without those, so they usually get their money.
The city I live in, is looking scarce in some areas because of businesses' closing. People can't afford to pay for the extra expense on the own business, let alone on their house. It saddens me to see this happen because I know with each business that has closed, there are people hurting, and each of those people have families who have to eat, buy what they need, and just survive.
A couple of months ago, when I went to the Post Office, I asked a person there if stamps would go up in price within the next few months, They reassured me that it would not happen. On the news yesterday,I heard that stamps will go up 2 more cents to equal .44 cents. I know that it is just a few cents, but those cents add up. I decided from that point on, to buy the forever stamps only because even if I bought the forever stamp at .40 cents, I can use it now for the .42 cent stamp and I don't have to add any more postage. Well, you might want to buy more stamps because in May, stamps will be raised to .44 cents. Not only is the economy in the United States not doing well, they announce that California is in a financial crisis. Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger is doing all he can to cut the financial problems. He even said he may cut the unemployment payments or put it on hold for awhile. I can not imagine how my friends who were laid-off from their jobs because of the economy, and now won't be able to afford to eat if their unemployment is cut. There are so many people looking for jobs, yet there is not jobs to be found. I did find one job at a place near my doctor named YESCO. Check it online to see what it is.
I have another friend who had to foreclose on their house and when the White House promised that bailout money would go to banks to help people who lost their homes, the bank would not help my friends. It is a devastated time for them and are trying to make the best of it. Their family of four had to move in with a relative and that has happened to several of my friends. It not only reminds me of the "end times," it also reminds me of the Bible days when there was a great famine in Egypt and people could not even afford to eat. They had to sell their homes and land in exchange for food from Pharoah. (Genesis chapters 41-42 and chapter 47:20-26). I often wonder if something like that will happen here. I wonder if because people can't afford their homes, they can't find jobs, and they can't afford food, etc... Will we get to the point where we are so desperate for food and survival that we would sell our items to the government in exchange for food .
"Joseph said to the people, 'Now that I have bought you and your land today for Pharoah, here is seed for you so you can plant the ground...'" (Nothing may happen at all; I just keep thinking about the Bible during those hard times for those people in surrounding areas near Egypt.)
I want to encourage you to look to God during this very crucial time in the United States. It is easy to worry about everything, but try to remember God sees all and knows all; he is greater than the government or the economy.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
LORD, I GIVE YOU MY VESSEL*
God, I am your willing vessel.
Do to me what you will.
I am a vessel in training;
Broken, chipped, yet willing to be molded
again and again.
Do to me what you will,
so that you may be glorified
over and over.
For it is for you,
why I breathe
why I face each morning
and each night.
For it is for you,
why I live,
why I work,
move or rest.
I give you my ALL.
My WHOLE vessel.
It may be small and a bit fragile,
but it's ALL I have;
I give it to you.
EVERY piece, EVERY inch.
My Vessel, I give to you.
LORD, I give you MY VESSEL.
May 15, 2008
11:23 p.m.
Do to me what you will.
I am a vessel in training;
Broken, chipped, yet willing to be molded
again and again.
Do to me what you will,
so that you may be glorified
over and over.
For it is for you,
why I breathe
why I face each morning
and each night.
For it is for you,
why I live,
why I work,
move or rest.
I give you my ALL.
My WHOLE vessel.
It may be small and a bit fragile,
but it's ALL I have;
I give it to you.
EVERY piece, EVERY inch.
My Vessel, I give to you.
LORD, I give you MY VESSEL.
May 15, 2008
11:23 p.m.
Your love is ALL I Need*
God, I am your willing vessel;
Pour yourself inside of me.
I give my whole life to you,
that is who I really want to be.
Nothing else in this world
really matters, unless I have you.
Without you, everything would be hopeless;
so thankfully I have your love, so true.
Your love is really all I need.
I wrote this on May 14, 2008
6:30 p.m.
Pour yourself inside of me.
I give my whole life to you,
that is who I really want to be.
Nothing else in this world
really matters, unless I have you.
Without you, everything would be hopeless;
so thankfully I have your love, so true.
Your love is really all I need.
I wrote this on May 14, 2008
6:30 p.m.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Side Effects from Meds*
I will tell you a little of what I went through in the last 30 days. But first, let me tell you three things that are important. 1) Believe in God , 2) Trust God and 3) Have one to three close friends (to help guide you, pray for you, and ones you can confide in who are trustworthy). You never know when a tragedy happens or unexpected medical problems happen and you need God and those close friends to lean on.
Okay, All I remember is that I went to church Christmas Sunday, had Christmas at my friend’s house, and then two days later I had one medical problem after another regarding my headaches/migraines. The next thing I know was my room-mate was making plans for new year’s eve. I seriously asked her, “Is tomorrow new year’s eve?” No way, where did that week go. I was practically comatose for a whole week and didn’t realize the world spinned passed me over and over again. With all these health issues, I didn’t feel my normal self, I couldn’t speak correctly, and believe me, I was just a mess. My close friends called to make sure I was okay, made sure I was eating, and just lifted me up in prayer. I am so grateful for my room mate who took me a few times in my distress and just prayed over me. The rest I honestly don’t remember except for some horrible side effects. I remember staring at the tv or the four walls of the house a lot, but a lot of it is a blurr. I remember trying to pray, but my friends had to help me pray, because I couldn’t do it on my own. My mind was so unclear, I was so out of it.
Recently I felt I was close to death, but the feeling was stronger than death itself. Let me explain. I excitedly went to church for the first time January 20 since Christmas Sunday, but I came home with a rather horrible headache, so that night I took some new medication the doctor prescribed. I then grabbed an ice pack to place over my eyes, and went to bed. I slept for a couple of hours. I woke up very nauseated, and then I felt like I was having a heart attack without the chest pain. Then I felt this weird sensation all over my body like oxygen was leaving my brain, veins, and heart. I felt so weak, that I couldn’t get up out of bed, I couldn’t talk, I couldn’t see clearly. Lights were flashing in my vision. (I later found out that the medication caused my esophagus to spasm which makes you feel like you are having a heart attack, well that’s what the doctor told me).
Thank God, it wasn't a real heart attack. Medication can do horrible things. So now that is my 3rd new medication I have had to throw away because of the side effects.
I don’t know if any of this is making any sense. Maybe I am writing it because You need a good laugh, or maybe you need to realize I am still needing prayer. Or maybe you need to realize that yes, everyone needs to make sure they are right with God at all times, because at any second of any day, at any time, something can happen.
Don’t take you life for granted! Believe and trust God, have some close friends near by, and make sure God is your God because you never know when it may be too late. You may have a medicated heart attack-like symptoms like I had or you may have a real heart attack and die. How’s your relationship with God?
When a friend or pastor asks, “is your heart and life right with God?” Seriously make sure it is...You never know when you are going to die... or not.
**************************************************************************
To finish the story, I emailed my headache doctor today, since she is a Christian, I asked her to pray before I take any more medications she has put on order. (She wants to start me on two more headache meds).
She emailed me back and said: I will pray but in order to do that and to really listen to the voice of God, I’m not going to be back to you for a day or so. I take this seriously so please remember that I will be taking it into prayer and will get back to you when I hear...
PRAISE GOD...Just knowing that my doctor is going before the throne of God on my behalf puts joy in my soul.
***********************************************************************************************************************
Thank you for all of you who have and are praying for me I appreciate it ! And for all those who have called me, went to get my meds for me, and just was there for me, I thank you so much.
Okay, All I remember is that I went to church Christmas Sunday, had Christmas at my friend’s house, and then two days later I had one medical problem after another regarding my headaches/migraines. The next thing I know was my room-mate was making plans for new year’s eve. I seriously asked her, “Is tomorrow new year’s eve?” No way, where did that week go. I was practically comatose for a whole week and didn’t realize the world spinned passed me over and over again. With all these health issues, I didn’t feel my normal self, I couldn’t speak correctly, and believe me, I was just a mess. My close friends called to make sure I was okay, made sure I was eating, and just lifted me up in prayer. I am so grateful for my room mate who took me a few times in my distress and just prayed over me. The rest I honestly don’t remember except for some horrible side effects. I remember staring at the tv or the four walls of the house a lot, but a lot of it is a blurr. I remember trying to pray, but my friends had to help me pray, because I couldn’t do it on my own. My mind was so unclear, I was so out of it.
Recently I felt I was close to death, but the feeling was stronger than death itself. Let me explain. I excitedly went to church for the first time January 20 since Christmas Sunday, but I came home with a rather horrible headache, so that night I took some new medication the doctor prescribed. I then grabbed an ice pack to place over my eyes, and went to bed. I slept for a couple of hours. I woke up very nauseated, and then I felt like I was having a heart attack without the chest pain. Then I felt this weird sensation all over my body like oxygen was leaving my brain, veins, and heart. I felt so weak, that I couldn’t get up out of bed, I couldn’t talk, I couldn’t see clearly. Lights were flashing in my vision. (I later found out that the medication caused my esophagus to spasm which makes you feel like you are having a heart attack, well that’s what the doctor told me).
Thank God, it wasn't a real heart attack. Medication can do horrible things. So now that is my 3rd new medication I have had to throw away because of the side effects.
I don’t know if any of this is making any sense. Maybe I am writing it because You need a good laugh, or maybe you need to realize I am still needing prayer. Or maybe you need to realize that yes, everyone needs to make sure they are right with God at all times, because at any second of any day, at any time, something can happen.
Don’t take you life for granted! Believe and trust God, have some close friends near by, and make sure God is your God because you never know when it may be too late. You may have a medicated heart attack-like symptoms like I had or you may have a real heart attack and die. How’s your relationship with God?
When a friend or pastor asks, “is your heart and life right with God?” Seriously make sure it is...You never know when you are going to die... or not.
**************************************************************************
To finish the story, I emailed my headache doctor today, since she is a Christian, I asked her to pray before I take any more medications she has put on order. (She wants to start me on two more headache meds).
She emailed me back and said: I will pray but in order to do that and to really listen to the voice of God, I’m not going to be back to you for a day or so. I take this seriously so please remember that I will be taking it into prayer and will get back to you when I hear...
PRAISE GOD...Just knowing that my doctor is going before the throne of God on my behalf puts joy in my soul.
***********************************************************************************************************************
Thank you for all of you who have and are praying for me I appreciate it ! And for all those who have called me, went to get my meds for me, and just was there for me, I thank you so much.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Mosquitoes and the power of God*
I recently visited Oklahoma. Its beautiful, true-blue skies and pure white, puffy clouds remind me of refreshing air to breathe and that is NOT what we have in CA. In OK, there was no evidence of smog and the true, fresh rain it offers is “real” rain... It doesn’t sprinkle; it pours… Oklahomans are thankful that their three year drought is over.
If for some reason, you could not hear or see the rain, its aftermath was evident. My sweet body seems to be attracted to the flying, hopping, jumping, and ummm… skipping insects… (No, I don’t attract guys, I attract insects… Ha Ha… LOL…). I could have connected the dots of the swollen lumps of those, small and mighty insect bites.
After a refreshing shower, I decided to saturate my body with the aroma of mosquito and flying insect repellent. (I have to because I am one of those people who are allergic to one of God’s creatures and then there is that West Nile Virus thing). Guess what I learned? Never ‘SPRAY’ your legs with Insect repellent after you shave them…IT BURNS… (Sorry guys, but it was like that “Home Alone” movie. I wanted to hold my legs and scream like that kid held his cheeks. No Tamara, I didn’t do that.)
So I either spray on the stuff right after I shower, and my legs would burn, or I wait a while, but then the mosquitoes would attack. Which is worse?
For some reason, I kept thinking about the mosquitoes and their powerful bite and how it coincides with a Christian’s life (with the power of God.) If I could be like the tiny mosquito who may be small, yet it has a mighty powerful bite. It was so evident that the mosquito had visited me…(If it would be so evident that the power of God had visited me and was in me).
If I could be a Christian, (one Christian in the midst of millions in the world), doing the will of God and taking on HIS Power, How powerful would that be? WOW!!! Then if 5 people get together and do the will of God, how powerful would that be, and then if 25 people get together and do the will of God, how powerful would that be…and so on… WOW, that’s amazing and we can do it… God has a work for us to do...
(Take time to think about it)
Friday, October 26, 2007
Learning a few Lessons*, at the Airport*
Learning a few lessons, AGAIN…before leaving the airport
After I arrived at the Ontario airport, Liz was kind enough to help me bring my luggage to the “check- in” line before she left. We said goodbye and then I waited in line; you know the usual stuff that happens. When I checked in, the female employee asked for my I.D. and then she asked me to pick up one of the luggages to put it on the scale. I kindly told her that it was too heavy for me and asked if she would help me. She said, “no, but if you aren’t going to do it, then I am not either.” I said, “Okay.”
She then proceeded to tell me to bring my check-in luggages to another section to be screened. No problem, I thought. Then I tried to juggle 2 luggages, one carry-on, my purse, and a jacket. I had no luck; I kept dropping things including my ticket and I.D. I finally asked for help. The lady called for “assistance” and then an employee came with a wheel chair, I told him I didn’t need the wheel chair, I just needed a little bit of help to get to the security screening. The female employee said, “We don’t do that,” and the male employee kindly said he’d help me…I was so grateful…Everything checked-in and I was set for the carry-on luggage to be screened.
Everything was fine, until the security lady asked me if the small black carry-on was mine; after I said yes, she pulled me to the side to look through it… I wasn’t worried because I did everything the airlines said to do. I had all my medicines in their original bottles, no knives, guns (can you picture me with a gun? No way), or sharp objects, and I even had all the 3 oz. bottles in the Ziploc bag. So I thought nothing of it… She searched it over and over again until she pulled out a can of Cambells’ chicken noodle soup and asked if I needed this. I said, “yes, I planned on eating it…I was just thinking of my hunger and stomach problems, that’s why I brought it along. She asked me two more times, “do you need this soup?” I said yes, but then I was thinking: go ahead and take it…I don’t need it that bad… She came closer to me and quietly said, “I will let you bring it on this time, but don’t bring it on again. We are not supposed to let you bring on liquids.” I apologized for bringing it, but I told her that I was just honestly thinking of my stomach and nothing else and it never occurred to me, to not bring it.” ..So from now on, note to self and the rest of the world: do not bring Campbell’s soup on board the airplane.
When Leaving Oklahoma …
As I waited patiently in line, took off my shoes, my jacket, and put all objects in the bucket, I proceeded through the security section and of course, the alarm went off. So I showed them my metallic medical Medic Alert necklace which I thought was the problem. The security guy asked me a series of questions as he came closer to make sure I didn’t proceed to another area. Thankfully he asked if I was wearing a belt, I thought, -oh yeah, I just bought a belt in OK and it has a big buckle, so I had to put that through the security screening… I was so grateful it was my belt; I didn’t want to be physically searched.
NOTE TO SELF: NO big belt buckles and NO cans of soup. How will I eat or hold my pants up? LOL
Have a great God-loving day...
After I arrived at the Ontario airport, Liz was kind enough to help me bring my luggage to the “check- in” line before she left. We said goodbye and then I waited in line; you know the usual stuff that happens. When I checked in, the female employee asked for my I.D. and then she asked me to pick up one of the luggages to put it on the scale. I kindly told her that it was too heavy for me and asked if she would help me. She said, “no, but if you aren’t going to do it, then I am not either.” I said, “Okay.”
She then proceeded to tell me to bring my check-in luggages to another section to be screened. No problem, I thought. Then I tried to juggle 2 luggages, one carry-on, my purse, and a jacket. I had no luck; I kept dropping things including my ticket and I.D. I finally asked for help. The lady called for “assistance” and then an employee came with a wheel chair, I told him I didn’t need the wheel chair, I just needed a little bit of help to get to the security screening. The female employee said, “We don’t do that,” and the male employee kindly said he’d help me…I was so grateful…Everything checked-in and I was set for the carry-on luggage to be screened.
Everything was fine, until the security lady asked me if the small black carry-on was mine; after I said yes, she pulled me to the side to look through it… I wasn’t worried because I did everything the airlines said to do. I had all my medicines in their original bottles, no knives, guns (can you picture me with a gun? No way), or sharp objects, and I even had all the 3 oz. bottles in the Ziploc bag. So I thought nothing of it… She searched it over and over again until she pulled out a can of Cambells’ chicken noodle soup and asked if I needed this. I said, “yes, I planned on eating it…I was just thinking of my hunger and stomach problems, that’s why I brought it along. She asked me two more times, “do you need this soup?” I said yes, but then I was thinking: go ahead and take it…I don’t need it that bad… She came closer to me and quietly said, “I will let you bring it on this time, but don’t bring it on again. We are not supposed to let you bring on liquids.” I apologized for bringing it, but I told her that I was just honestly thinking of my stomach and nothing else and it never occurred to me, to not bring it.” ..So from now on, note to self and the rest of the world: do not bring Campbell’s soup on board the airplane.
When Leaving Oklahoma …
As I waited patiently in line, took off my shoes, my jacket, and put all objects in the bucket, I proceeded through the security section and of course, the alarm went off. So I showed them my metallic medical Medic Alert necklace which I thought was the problem. The security guy asked me a series of questions as he came closer to make sure I didn’t proceed to another area. Thankfully he asked if I was wearing a belt, I thought, -oh yeah, I just bought a belt in OK and it has a big buckle, so I had to put that through the security screening… I was so grateful it was my belt; I didn’t want to be physically searched.
NOTE TO SELF: NO big belt buckles and NO cans of soup. How will I eat or hold my pants up? LOL
Have a great God-loving day...
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Creepy critters*
okay, I am back from Oklahoma and I had a welcome visitor today. I kept hearing this weird sounding noise in the back yard, but thought nothing of it. Even that cat was a little fearful looking.
I went outside, looked up at the patio and noticed a foot (or more) long tail hanging through the wood slots. SO I went a little ways out and low and behold, there was a fuzzy creature. I couldn't see his face. I decided to go get my cell phone to take a picture of it.
It had moved: I looked at a different position and slowly climbed on a white chair to get a better view, and I used the flashlight because it was dark outside.
I then saw this this long tailed, furry possum bigger than Liz's cat "PC". I was freaked out and wasn't sure if it was going to jump on me, thankfully it looked as much scared as I was. It had two fangs and some sharp looking smaller teeth. I looked to the side for a moment.
All of a sudden I heard it chomping on something that looked like a big Bettle bug. It was salivating and sucking out the inside of whatever it was eating and chomping loudly. It was pretty disqusting. Then I got a closer look of what it was eating. It was a small avocado. After it was done eating, it let the avocado pit fall to the ground.. It was huge.
{EEEWWW...Pam, Penny, and Debbie, this is no joke... forget the tree rat, the bugs, the dogs, the frogs, I think this was the worst and it was on the patio roof of my backyard}. How do Liz and I get rid of it? Any ideas? See ya all soon...I have lots of things to blog about regarding my trip, so I will be writing y'all soon..
I went outside, looked up at the patio and noticed a foot (or more) long tail hanging through the wood slots. SO I went a little ways out and low and behold, there was a fuzzy creature. I couldn't see his face. I decided to go get my cell phone to take a picture of it.
It had moved: I looked at a different position and slowly climbed on a white chair to get a better view, and I used the flashlight because it was dark outside.
I then saw this this long tailed, furry possum bigger than Liz's cat "PC". I was freaked out and wasn't sure if it was going to jump on me, thankfully it looked as much scared as I was. It had two fangs and some sharp looking smaller teeth. I looked to the side for a moment.
All of a sudden I heard it chomping on something that looked like a big Bettle bug. It was salivating and sucking out the inside of whatever it was eating and chomping loudly. It was pretty disqusting. Then I got a closer look of what it was eating. It was a small avocado. After it was done eating, it let the avocado pit fall to the ground.. It was huge.
{EEEWWW...Pam, Penny, and Debbie, this is no joke... forget the tree rat, the bugs, the dogs, the frogs, I think this was the worst and it was on the patio roof of my backyard}. How do Liz and I get rid of it? Any ideas? See ya all soon...I have lots of things to blog about regarding my trip, so I will be writing y'all soon..
Saturday, September 15, 2007
I am a Prisoner in my own Body*
Teensy's Pitty Party Poem- if I were a prisoner in my own body
Tonight I lay awake
in pain
The muscle spasms have
overtaken
my body.
I pray as
an ice pak
is under the back of my neck
and one is
over my eyes.
A heating pack is
wrapped around
my back.
I praise God, yet
I am in so much pain.
The throbbing pain,
the tortured inflammation
of my body
is screaming
and keeping me
awake.
God, I trust
in you.
Jesus, how did YOU feel
with nails in you?
Nothing to soothe you,
but death.
Yet death is
not in my present.
For God
wants me here
at this very moment.
I know,
it's worth it,
yet please God,
take the edge off.
My head feels
like it weighs a ton.
It is somewhat soothed
by the frozen water
clenched
against my face.
Yet,
it melts.
Tonight I lay awake
in pain
The muscle spasms have
overtaken
my body.
I pray as
an ice pak
is under the back of my neck
and one is
over my eyes.
A heating pack is
wrapped around
my back.
I praise God, yet
I am in so much pain.
The throbbing pain,
the tortured inflammation
of my body
is screaming
and keeping me
awake.
God, I trust
in you.
Jesus, how did YOU feel
with nails in you?
Nothing to soothe you,
but death.
Yet death is
not in my present.
For God
wants me here
at this very moment.
I know,
it's worth it,
yet please God,
take the edge off.
My head feels
like it weighs a ton.
It is somewhat soothed
by the frozen water
clenched
against my face.
Yet,
it melts.
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Acupuncture Adventure*-One Needle At a Time*
Have you ever got to the point that you are in so much pain that you are reaching out for any medical treatment possible that you haven't tried? Well, I decided to try Acupuncture for the first time due to doctors' referrals and friends' advice.
With all my crazy medical treatments I have had in the last 12 years, You may think I would enjoy smaller pin needles. Well, I wish I was.
Past experiences: I have had needles put through my skull to inject some kind of medicine in my head. I'll never forget the time they did the injections in my head and I heard the crunching sound of the needle going through my skull. It gives me the creeps to this day, just thinking about it. I had that done many times. Also there was the time I had an anthrocentesis procedure where they inject the inside and outside of my jaw more than eight times with some steroid stuff - or - the time I had a procedure where they maneuvered the needle in my jaw joint to dislocate it and then shoot cortisone stuff in there.
Wow, I am feeling better now that I am telling you all about this...
Well today, I had the acupuncture appointment. First, the doctor said I was the youngest patient he ever has had. Then he looked over my medical history and realized why I was there. He put extreme pressure on all the painful areas he thought would need treatment for today.
Funny Stuff: He told me to lie down and put my head on this table and pillow with a hole in it. (I have only seen these in the movies). He asked if I was okay; I said I couldn't breathe. He then realized the table and pillow was the wrong size for my tiny head, then he realized the paper for the pillow and table was covering the breathing area. After that adjustment, I laughingly told him that everything was cool and I was able to breathe again, thank God.
Treatment:
No.1 He had to prepare each section of treatment.
No.2 He had to find the extreme painful tender spots of my back, neck, and shoulders by applying great amounts of pressure on the knots and tender points.
No.3 He stuck me with a tool in each place he wanted these needles to go in
No.4 He put these needles in each of the spots that he previously stuck me in.
I had tiny needles all over.
No.5 He put a heat lamp on my lower back with the pin needles already in me
No.6 He said "I'll be back in 20 minutes" and turned off the light.
Slight problems:
No.1 I realized my head wasn't accurately in the table pillow, but I couldn't move because of the pin needles poking me.
No.2 I tried to relax, and listen to the quiet music, but the crickets in the song were driving me crazy.
No.3 I tried to relax even more, so I closed my eyes and prayed. Well, I tried, I guess he had a pin needle in one of the nerves that reaches out to the eye lid. I could only close one eye at a time. When I tried to close both eyes, it made the pin needles in my neck poke me even more.
No.4 Through all of this, I realized I was all tense, so I took a deep breath and seeped deep into the cushioned table I was laying on, but then I realized the table pillow was too high for my head. My neck was in too high of an awkward place, so I tried to change positions, yet the pin needles stuck me even more.
No.5 He took out all the pins and then rubbed this herbal cream on that burned tremendously. Even though he took out all the needles, I kept grabbing my back because it felt like the needles were still there.
No.6 He then tells me I will be in more pain because it triggered muscle spasms.
No.7 He said that he'll see me this Monday because I am in lots of Chronic Pain. I want to say: umm, you caused more pain. Of course, I am in pain... well anyway... So I have scheduled 3 more appointments before I go visit my mom on September 25. Let's see if this works. I'll let you know.
After the treatment: My neck was okay, but boy, my back was in burning pain for 4 hours. I went home and put an ice pack on my back. Right about now, I am unable to sit back on the chair because it is in excruciating, burning pain and there feels like 50 needles are stuck in me. The things we do for treatment. I just pray this works for me...
Well, now you know how it feels, sounds, and is with acupuncture.
Until next time,
signing off for now,
(By the way, after going to 2-3 treatments, I had to stop because it was just too much pain and didn't have a great result. I called the doctor and told him about the head to toe muscle spasms and pain I was feeling after each session and he said, "that doesn't usually happen.")
With all my crazy medical treatments I have had in the last 12 years, You may think I would enjoy smaller pin needles. Well, I wish I was.
Past experiences: I have had needles put through my skull to inject some kind of medicine in my head. I'll never forget the time they did the injections in my head and I heard the crunching sound of the needle going through my skull. It gives me the creeps to this day, just thinking about it. I had that done many times. Also there was the time I had an anthrocentesis procedure where they inject the inside and outside of my jaw more than eight times with some steroid stuff - or - the time I had a procedure where they maneuvered the needle in my jaw joint to dislocate it and then shoot cortisone stuff in there.
Wow, I am feeling better now that I am telling you all about this...
Well today, I had the acupuncture appointment. First, the doctor said I was the youngest patient he ever has had. Then he looked over my medical history and realized why I was there. He put extreme pressure on all the painful areas he thought would need treatment for today.
Funny Stuff: He told me to lie down and put my head on this table and pillow with a hole in it. (I have only seen these in the movies). He asked if I was okay; I said I couldn't breathe. He then realized the table and pillow was the wrong size for my tiny head, then he realized the paper for the pillow and table was covering the breathing area. After that adjustment, I laughingly told him that everything was cool and I was able to breathe again, thank God.
Treatment:
No.1 He had to prepare each section of treatment.
No.2 He had to find the extreme painful tender spots of my back, neck, and shoulders by applying great amounts of pressure on the knots and tender points.
No.3 He stuck me with a tool in each place he wanted these needles to go in
No.4 He put these needles in each of the spots that he previously stuck me in.
I had tiny needles all over.
No.5 He put a heat lamp on my lower back with the pin needles already in me
No.6 He said "I'll be back in 20 minutes" and turned off the light.
Slight problems:
No.1 I realized my head wasn't accurately in the table pillow, but I couldn't move because of the pin needles poking me.
No.2 I tried to relax, and listen to the quiet music, but the crickets in the song were driving me crazy.
No.3 I tried to relax even more, so I closed my eyes and prayed. Well, I tried, I guess he had a pin needle in one of the nerves that reaches out to the eye lid. I could only close one eye at a time. When I tried to close both eyes, it made the pin needles in my neck poke me even more.
No.4 Through all of this, I realized I was all tense, so I took a deep breath and seeped deep into the cushioned table I was laying on, but then I realized the table pillow was too high for my head. My neck was in too high of an awkward place, so I tried to change positions, yet the pin needles stuck me even more.
No.5 He took out all the pins and then rubbed this herbal cream on that burned tremendously. Even though he took out all the needles, I kept grabbing my back because it felt like the needles were still there.
No.6 He then tells me I will be in more pain because it triggered muscle spasms.
No.7 He said that he'll see me this Monday because I am in lots of Chronic Pain. I want to say: umm, you caused more pain. Of course, I am in pain... well anyway... So I have scheduled 3 more appointments before I go visit my mom on September 25. Let's see if this works. I'll let you know.
After the treatment: My neck was okay, but boy, my back was in burning pain for 4 hours. I went home and put an ice pack on my back. Right about now, I am unable to sit back on the chair because it is in excruciating, burning pain and there feels like 50 needles are stuck in me. The things we do for treatment. I just pray this works for me...
Well, now you know how it feels, sounds, and is with acupuncture.
Until next time,
signing off for now,
(By the way, after going to 2-3 treatments, I had to stop because it was just too much pain and didn't have a great result. I called the doctor and told him about the head to toe muscle spasms and pain I was feeling after each session and he said, "that doesn't usually happen.")
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